Journals {KSJ} SLOW UPDATES

7. Sulking

Jin had fallen asleep in his office since he had had a long shift, it was going to be a quick nap but it had been more since he'd stayed at the hospital soon his sleeping would be interrupted due to him being called for some type of emergency.

Jin felt the surface underneath him wet, he snapped up and realised that he had drooled on himself. He quickly wiped away the drool and went to his chair rubbing his eyes in hopes of getting rid of the stuff that was forming in his eyes. He grabbed his white coat and straightened it up as he placed it on, he sighed in relief realizing last nights occurrences which revolved around (Y/N).

Before leaving the room he went to his hand sanitizer and squeezed the product onto his hands and left the office; walking and rubbing the sanitizer on his hands making his way to the patient's room. She'd be his first stop before going to work.

Jin now stood in front of her room and stood there for a minute, taking a deep breath in he turned the doorknob feeling butterflies in his stomach for some odd reason.

Jin opened the door and felt his heart drop to the ground as soon as he saw her, she looked so pale and lifeless, he felt as everything that had happened was some sad dream but it wasn't. Jin closed the door behind him and slowly walked to her, he took her hand onto his own and rubbed his thumb against her hand.  Jin looked at her and felt guilty about him not being able to stop her suicidal thoughts. He wished that he could help her through this depression, he wanted to see her smile and just see her become happy not sulking.

"(Y/N)...I promise I'll make things better for you... You have to fight through this, you can't give up. You have still so much life to live..." , Jin sighed.

"Why do I have this need to want to help her? (Y/N) is like another patient but why do I have this need to console her and this want to protect her?" Jin asked himself while stroking her cheek.

(Y/N) began to move around to which he moved his hands away from her hoping to not make her uncomfortable, a grunt came from her mouth making him worried as to what seemed to be hurting or bothering her.

"(Y/N)? Are you okay?" Jin asked.

(Y/N) shook her head and extended her hands as if she were a child seeking comfort from their parent's, Jin was surprised at her reaction but he complied and sat next to her on the bed and took her into his embrace and later on heard sobs escape her lips.

Jin sat on the bed and stroked her head, "Sh...its okay (Y/N) I'm here."

(Y/N)'s sobs became silent and her breathing calmed, Jin no longer felt her head against his chest to which he looked down to see what she was up to and saw her looking up at him.

Her look seemed sad but captivated by him, he seemed to be an angel due to the fact that he was by her side and attentive with (Y/N) and wasn't asking for anything in return.

Jin placed a hand under her chin, he licked his lips and looked at her dearly. He felt his heart pumping inside his ribcage, he couldn't believe what his body was ordering for him to do and so he leaned in and watched (Y/N)'s reaction.

She was frozen; she wasn't sure of what or how to react since she'd never kissed someone before basically she'd never had her first kiss and she felt embarrassed.

Jin's lips now laid a couple of inches away from (Y/N)'s, she felt his breath on her lips and slowly he inched even closer making their lips slightly touch...

"Dr. Kim Seokjin! You are needed in urgent care!"

The intercom interfered the moment between the two, Jin realized what he was about to do and sat up from the bed and fixed his composure clearing up his throat.

"I-i'm sorry (Y/N)....I-I shouldn't have. Um.."

(Y/N) stayed silent listening to what Jin had to say.

"I'll be back to check on your wound.." Jin left the room and her gaze followed his movements .

She was longing for the kiss to her surprise, she felt that it was right somehow meanwhile Jin guilty for what he was about to do. He was fighting with himself, one side of him wanted to do it but he felt that it was unethical for doctor to kiss a patient.

Jin shook his head trying to clear his mind and focus on what should be important, his job as a doctor. He had to help the rest of his patients and become updated to what all of their statuses were in order to help them get a proper diagnosis to the situations each one were in.