🌹Ezzy🌹
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~all that i can hear is breathing~
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A/N: even though I've stated that this whole story has a trigger warning, I'm still gonna give you a heads up, so again, trigger warning.
I slowly pull up my sweater as I look in the mirror at my pale body. I don't want to look and see, but I know that I must. After he hit me, I ran up to my room with all of my strength and locked my door, collapsing on my bed and muting my painful yells with a pillow. I had to wait an hour before I stopped hearing motion downstairs and knew that he passed out on the reclining chair as usual. I ran to the upstairs bathroom immediately.
Blue. Purple. Red. Large bruises were present on my side. Some of them had turned green from healing, but there was a fresh one. The bruise I got tonight was roughly the size of a football, and was partially on my waist and the other half directly on my ribs. I use one of my fingers and touch the bony spot. A sharp pain shoots through me from the simple contact as I swallow my screams, trying not to wake him.
I broke a few ribs, and it hurts like a bitch.
I know I need medical attention, but what would I say? I can't tell anyone about what happened or else I'll be taken... or else he will hunt me down and... It's always a reoccurring topic that pops up whenever I slightly mention wanting to leave.
If you ever try to turn me in- if you ever tell anyone- I won't hesitate to kill you and that neighbor boy you're friends with. Both of us know that I can make it look like an accident. If you don't believe me, just ask your mother's grave.
I could live with being gone myself, but the fact that he threatens Jimin as well is what makes me pause. Dad has no reason to hate him other than the fact he keeps me out of the house. I couldn't stand him hurting my best friend.
Small, wet drops form in the corners of my eyes as I fall to the bathroom floor in pain. More than anything I just wish I could seek help, but I just... can't.
In an attempt to heal myself, I resort to the usual. Hurting myself even more.
Each little line removes a little piece of mental pain while I pull up the sleeve of my sweater and drag the razor across my skin. It makes my brain hurt less, but makes my body hurt more... yet I can't stop. It feels nice to relieve the itching that has been bugging me all day long, so I continue until both arms have a glossy coat of red and my brain feels fuzzy.
I lean my body on the bathroom radiator, my head spinning around me. This is the most cutting I've done in months, and my body isn't used to it, but my headspace feels so relieved from its exhaustion.
I hear a familiar, quiet tone coming from my bedroom down the hallway. It's the ringtone I have set for whenever Jimin calls me. I always answer him, but I decide not to go pick it up, figuring it's probably him apologizing for earlier even though he has no reason to. My brain feels so far from reality right now that I don't think I could muster up the strength to even walk that far.
With the ringtone growing even more distant, I stare at the lines of scars up and down my arms. I feel my eyes become heavy as they start to close, my head falling on the bathroom tile with utter ease.
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🌹🌹🌹
A/N: happy thanksgiving!
