Kevin Died

11. Keep Your Friends Close

11. Keep Your Friends Close

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I was determined.

I had to say something, I couldn't let her just ignore me without explaining myself properly.

Then again, what exactly was the proper way to explain myself? It wasn't like I could tell Sayora the truth. I desperately wanted to though. I wanted to tell her everything, just for the fact that I was losing my mind not being able to talk to her.

I knew that she wouldn't want to hear it if I didn't tell her exactly what happened, but I honestly didn't care. I just wanted her to know how shitty I felt, even if the two of us being together wouldn't be a thing anymore.

So when lunch rolled around and I noticed my friends sitting at the table and she wasn't there, my heart sank. She was always punctual. Always the first at the table. Always the first to class. Always the first to everything. So her not being there when I knew for a fact that she was at school was a clear sign that she was doing everything she could to avoid me.

I exchanged a quick look with Travis, whom was sitting in his usual spot by himself, and made my way over to the rest of my friends.

They stayed quiet as I took my spot, exchanging weird looks with each other. My mind raced, thinking of what I should say. How had I let it get to this point? It was so frustrating! I was trying to protect them and I was being punished for it. The fact that even Jory , the most talkative one of us, was silent meant that Luke and Danielle had already explained to him how they were currently feeling about me.

Now they all felt like I was dishonest and shady.

A couple more moments of silence went on with me pretending to text someone on my phone before thankfully, Jory finally said something.

"You're not hungry?" He asked.

I set my phone on the table and had to process the question for a few seconds. Mostly due to the fact that there was an initial shock that one of them had finally spoken to me, and partly because I was a little confused about what he was referring to. Once my slow brain grasped the understanding that it was lunch time and I didn't come to the table with food, I responded.

"Nah," I said, "not hungry."

"I'm not all that hungry either," Luke said.

"Yeah."

"Don't really have much of an appetite for lunch food."

"Understandable."

"You know what I do have an appetite for?" Luke said, this time he seemed to perk up, but it was obviously exaggerated.

"What would that be?" I deadpanned.

"A nice, hot, steaming bowl of honesty," came his solemn reply.

There it was. I had to keep myself from showing my annoyance, because this was the last thing I wanted to talk about with him or any of them.

"That's nice," I said with more venom in my voice than I had intended to use.

"You care to serve us some of that then?" Luke patronized.

"Luke, I already told you-"

"You told me a lie!"

"Just mind your business!" I spat.

Luke seemed dumbfounded by these words. "Mind my business?"

"Yes, that's what I said."

"Mind my business," Luke repeated incredulously. "You are my business, Ricky! How the fuck do you not understand that?"

"Since when is what I do your business?!"