Marrying Him ?

Late

"I...like Ajay. I don't know how to tell you...I'm in love with him. I...love...Ajay"

Exactly the same words I have on my tongue, except it is not my voice.

Ishani beat me already. She is in love with him. I lost...again.

"I love him Ahaana. He is so sweet, he cares about me. He respects me. More importantly he is not with me for my money or looks."

"Congrats Isha!!! I'm happy for you. If he makes you happy then you are lucky to get such boyfriend," I congratulated her heavy heartedly, blinking away from my tears.

"Thank you so much. I knew you would be happy." Yeah I am giddy with happiness.

"But the problem is we are not official. Sure we went out but only few times but that was mostly on friendly terms on my insistence. He never asked me out properly."

"Ohh." So they are not official couple. Yet.

"It scares me Hana. What if he doesn't like me? What if he has girlfriend already?" I'm the Hana...not someone else. Her nickname to me. I don't like that nickname much but seeing how happy she is to have a friend without any nickname, means she get to nick name me. She is very happy about that name. Her's is much better than mine. Isha.

"As far as I know Aj–Mr.James is not in any relationship. May be a few flings here and there. And don't worry he will love you. If not he is either blind or gay. No one on earth can loose you Isha"

Every single cell in my body is on fire. I want to scream I love Ajay. He is mine. I want to cry. Bawl my eyes out for God being unfair on me always.

But I can't do it. Not with Isha sitting opposite to me. I need to suck up my misery and be happy for her.

"I hope so Hana, I want it to work between us. But how do you that he is not in any relationship now?"

"Silly Isha you forgot that I live in his home"

"Yeah! I forgot. But why are you calling him Mr.James? Anyway tell me about him what you know. Was he any serious relationship before? That's why he is not married yet? Or still in love... Tell me about him please.... " She is a big question bank.

I pondered a lot whether to tell her about Kaira or not. Finally decided why not, it's not like his relationship with Kaira is secret. So I decided to tell her. "Never tell him that I'm the one who said you about it. Ajay was in a serious relationship for four years. They even considered Marrying two years back. I don't know the exact reason but they had an ugly breakup, according to his mother. After that he changed....bad change actually. It shook him to the core. After that he didn't love anyone I think."

"Ohh poor Ajay!!! I didn't know that. It would have been very painful for him, as they were even considering marriage. Then may be he won't love me, if he is still hung up on his ex."

"I don't think so. I probably don't know the truth, but I was informed that he will never go back to her. So don't worry about that. He will love you. Like I said if he doesn't love you he is either blind or gay." He will love anyone other than me.

"You are the sweetest person I have ever Hana. I'm extremely happy I found you that day in library."

"Me too. Even though I may not be best person to give you relationship advice, I'm here as a friend for you. Always."