My secret

Chapter 22

I put on my cowgirl boots and grabbed a jacket just in case. I walked out into the living room and for some reason Allie and Matt just stared at me. What's wrong I said looking between them.

Listen Lex I noticed it yesterday but since you were on baggy clothes I wasn't sure Allie said. Noticed what I asked giving her a confused look. You dropped weight and while that's a good thing you look like you lost 15 or more pounds in less than a week she said.

And that's not good I'm sorry but we're worried about you and said. I'm fine I said rolling my eyes just dropped some weight it's not a big deal.  Have you been eating Matt asked me folding his arms across his chest. Thankfully the doorbell rang I sighed in relief that I didn't have to answer that question will come back to this later he said pointing at me.

At the door was Josh he hasn't changed much since we were teenager's. He's still tall just taller now he cut his hair shorter which looked good on him he still was a dork though. But I always liked dorks but me and him were just friends now.

He hurt me 1 to many times for me to date plus I had a wonderful guy now anyway.  Josh was wearing a pair of dark wash jeans and a white beader and work boots.  Alright let's get going Jordan said he will meet us there when he gets off work Matt said.

We all piled into Matt's car and left.  Once at the park the kids took off to play. I didn't feel like  dealing with anyone so I put my headphones in. I hit shuffle on my country playlist and was walking around the playground when my favorite song came through my headphones.

Lady Antebellum you look good I was walking around when the song started to pick up. I forgot that I had people around me cause I was dancing around in my own little world. You look good all day all night you look good so fresh so fine. I sang as I ran up the slide. 

Then I slid down and  kept singing and dancing. Once the song ended I came back to reality and remembered I was surrounded by people I looked over at the picnic tables and saw Matt and Josh and Allie watching me and Jordan had apparently arrived at some point. 

I took my headphones out and walked over to the tables. I forgot I wasn't alone for a second I said not looking directly at anybody.

I forgot you could dance Josh said laughing a little. Yeah it's something I enjoy I said well your deffenitly good at it Allie added.

Thank you I said with a smile okay well food will be done soon Matt said to everyone. I'm not hungry I said starting to walk away ummm not how it works Lexy and you know it.

Your eating he said to me I rolled my eyes I'm good I said putting my headphones back in and walking away.  I looked through my playlist and settled on a song by Billy currington do I make you wanna. I was on the swings and signing a long to the song. 

I noticed Matt was passing out burgers and hotdogs a moment later. I looked over and saw a trial and walked towards it. I looked back and noticed Matt watching me but I kept going.

I had been walking for a bit and I came to an a clearing on the trail.  I was looking out at this really pretty creek when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I jumped and turned around.

It was Matt I took my headphones out , damn Matt you scared the shit out of me I said. Let's talk he said taking a seat in the grass and patting the spot next to him.

Okay I said giving him a strange look , why haven't you been eating again he asked.  What make you think I'm not eating I said to him. Because I know you lexy so what's going on.

I'll answer your questions if you answer mine in return I said. Okay agreed he said to me with a smile. I haven't been eating cause  I've been depressed I said now why didn't you tell Allie I said. 

Because I didn't see the point in it especially since nothing is going to happen between us he said.  That stung more than i thought It would and I knew he could see that in my face. So your turn I said clearing my throat.

Why are you depressed he asked ? I guess it's mainly cause I feel like you hate me cause of how i feel towards you.  Which is why you don't answer my messages  and stuff anymore. My turn I said,  do you hate me I asked looking him in the eyes. 

I never could he said with a smile. Okay my turn again are you starving yourself on purpose so you don't he asked. Not really I said it's just been hard and then Allie is so pretty and skinny that I feel like I have to compete I said.

He looked at me you do not need to anything he said. I care about you a lot and I know you have feelings for me but I just don't see you that way. But i promsie you I'm not going anywhere he said. 

It hurt but at least I still had his friendship I thought to myself. Let's head back I said standing up. Okay he said one more thing though he said standing in front of me. He looked me in the eyes and backed me up against  a tree. He stepped closer and see faces were inches  apart.

He then just smiled and walked away. Which left me very confused since he just said he don't have  feelings for me. Damn men are confusing I thought as we walked back towards the park.......