Millie Hardiman and the Red Parrot Fever

Mum Killed Me, Now I'm a Zombie - Part 2

At just after nine on a Saturday morning, Chops, Gwen's barber shop was quiet. Gwen had a teenage boy in the chair and a beaten down looking woman with twin boys aged about five, was trying to stop them running riot. Every other word she said was, "Sorry."

"You don't need to be here, Chunk." Gwen wanted Millie to suffer alone. "You're not grounded for making up malicious stories about your poor, sainted mum."

Chunk looked up from her phone and smiled. "S'alright, I don't mind. I was an orphan too."

Chunk, aka Norah-Anne Micklewhite, but only on official forms, adored Millie. Chunk was always smiling and happy. The perfect foil to her more serious friend. The girls had been inseparable since they met at Greenfields Nursery as toddlers. Ever since then, Millie had led and Chunk had followed. Usually, the only times they were apart, were when Chunk was either watching football or playing football. Her dad was a Brighton fan, and he had been taking her to games since she was four. Chunk also played for Bognor Sharks Girls' Football Club - under 14's. To Millie's delight, the normally mild-mannered Chunk turned into a terror on the football pitch, fighting with other players and abusing the referees. Millie and Penny often went along to watch her play, just for the fights.

"Millie, look bored. I don't want you enjoying yourself," Gwen ordered.

Millie was actually incredibly bored. Gwen had confiscated her phone so she couldn't check her WhatsApp. But there was no way she was going to let Gwen know the truth. "I love it here, Gwen," she smiled brightly. "I might come in every Saturday."

Gwen groaned inwardly.

The devil twins were smashing toy cars around the floor and one of the boys head-butted Millie's knee. Their mother apologised again and told them to play quietly. The boys ignored her.

"It's ok." Millie made a sympathetic face, then leaned over to the boys. "Do you like cars?"

Both boys nodded. "I used to love cars too, until the accident. My mum picked me up after the Brownies. She'd had a drink, I could smell it on her. You know what it's like when your mum's drunk don't you?" The boys nodded, sitting on the floor now, big eyes watching Millie. Their mother shuffled in embarrassment.

"Of course, she said she was alright to drive." Millie was enjoying the story now.

"Millie! Stop right now!" Gwen warned her.

Millie ignored her. "She raced out of the car park on two wheels and even though I begged her to slow down, she was too busy on her phone to listen to me."

Millie smiled sweetly at Gwen before turning back to the boys. "You know it's wrong to use a phone when you're driving, don't you?"

Both boys nodded agreement and Millie's voice took on more urgency. "The car was going really fast and she raced through red lights. I could see we were heading for the river and I screamed, MUM!" Everybody jumped, including Chunk and the boy in Gwen's chair. They were all entranced by the story now.

"When the car crashed into the river, it turned upside down. I was underwater fighting for my life." Millie was in full storyteller mode now. She blew out her cheeks and held her breath, flailing her arms wildly and miming her frantic fight for survival. The boys and their mother were watching with open mouths. Gwen was clipping at the air and listening to the story.

Millie suddenly let her breath out and gasped dramatically for air. She was wide-eyed and breathing heavily now. "I tried to smash the glass with my fists and I kicked the doors, but mum had put the child locks on," Millie paused and then continued dramatically, "and that meant I was doomed!"

Millie's voice became sad now. "The police divers finally got my body out of the wreck, but it was too late. The doctors said I had been dead for an hour, but somehow the cold water had kept my brain alive."

Millie then pointed dramatically at Gwen. "She killed me! It was her! My own mother escaped and left me to die." Then she curled her hands into claws to grab the boys and jumped towards them shouting, "Now I'm a zombie!"

The boys recoiled in terror and began to scream.

"Get out, Millie!" Gwen knew she'd let Millie win, but she couldn't face listening to her winding up the customers all day. "Go home and do not leave the house, or use any electronic gadgets. I will be checking."

Millie left triumphantly, with Chunk in tow.

..

As the door closed, Gwen was apologising to her customer. He was a good looking boy with wavy, blonde hair. He had asked Gwen just to trim the back and sides, and he had quite firmly, Gwen thought, refused her kind offer to give him a side parting; even when she said it would make him look nice and smart.

"Sorry about that. She's my daughter. She's about your age, maybe you know her from school?"

"I don't go to school. I have a tutor." The boy seemed to think that that was normal.

"Don't you miss your friends?" Gwen couldn't imagine a kid not going to school.

"I see too much of my friends." The boy seemed quite glum. Probably because he wasn't at school. "We're always on tour together."

"On tour? That sounds exciting."

"It's really not. We spend most days in a tour bus, bored out of our minds." Gwen wondered if One D had the same problem. "I'm in a boy band called Teenz. You might've heard of us."

"Sorry, I don't listen to the charts anymore," Gwen confessed. "Have you been on the telly?"

"Nah, we're still doing schools and stuff, to build a fan base."

"Let me know when you make it big. I'll put a sign up in the shop, saying this is where you got your hair cut. What's your name? I'll need that for the sign."

"I'm Johnny Watson."