Tragic

Chapter Thirty-Five: Negotiations

She quiet for a minute, staring down at the pavement.

"You want Judah?" I offer.

She laughs once. "Please. He's madly in love with you. This is going to kill him."

I shake my head. "Don't even joke about that," I say firmly.

"I'm sorry," she says holding her hands up. A devious expression crosses her face again. "I want to be prom queen, too."

"Fine, I'll withdraw my nomination."

Her eyes narrow. "You don't care about any of this do you?"

"No, I really don't. It means nothing, Cam. Next year we'll be at college and nobody will care who the fucking prom queen was."

She balls her fists at her sides. "Well, it's a big deal to me!"

My eyes widen. Cameron is known to be dramatic, but this is a bit much. "Okay, you're right. Just don't tell Judah. I don't want to hurt him."

"Are you kidding me? You think cheating on him isn't hurting him?"

My jaw clenches, and I close my eyes, taking deep breaths through my nose. "Cameron, you don't know the whole story. Let me handle Judah, okay? You can have whatever you want, just leave him out of it."

She slings her bag roughly over her shoulder. "Fine. Opening night, you get the stomach flu or something."

I nod and give a curt smile. "It's your story."

"Your damn right it is." She opens her car door and leans against it. "And I have a feeling things are going to be a lot different from now on."

Anger surges through my veins as I watch her pull down my driveway. Of all the ways I envisioned us being caught, this wasn't one of them. I must have stood here for longer than I realized because Hunter's arms come around me again. He presses his lips to the side of my head. "You okay, baby?"

I turn around in his arms and shake my head. "No. This is completely fucked."

He smiles and I glare at him. "It's not. Cameron is a nobody."

"Well, her desire to be a somebody is going to destroy us."

His arms close me in tighter, and I bury my face into his chest. "We'll figure it out. We always do."

All I can do is sigh and pray that he's right.

***

As planned, I stage a dramatic vomit session in the ladies room an hour before curtain. I don't actually throw up, but I've heard Janie Thomas do if for real so many times after lunch it wasn't hard to imitate.

It worked perfectly, and Cameron showed off some of her acting skills by pretending to be the concerned friend. No one questioned it when she stepped in to take my place, although I could tell she was pissed they were worried about me.

Judah came to help me orchestrate my exit and is currently driving me home. He's quiet again, and I wish I knew what he was thinking. Even though I had to convince Hunter to be on board with this, I also had to convince myself. I know the damage it's doing to both of them. I can't even imagine how I would feel if Hunter had to pretend to date his ex. I'm not typically a jealous person, but with him I think I might be.

When Judah pulls into my driveway, he puts the truck in park, but doesn't cut the ignition. He stares straight ahead with one of his hands on the steering wheel.

He bites his bottom lip, clearly choosing his words carefully. I mentally prepare myself for whatever he has to say. "I know Hunter isn't cool with this."

"Would you be?"

He laughs, shaking his head. "Nope." He looks at me, and his gaze makes my stomach flip. "I'm not even okay with it now."

I open my mouth to respond, but he keeps going. "—but I understand why this happened. I should have never left you alone, and at least I can be thankful he was here for you when I should have been."

My words get caught in my throat again. I'm still struggling with the honesty I've been getting from him lately. I try not to dwell too much on the 'what ifs' in our situation. Everything happens for a reason I guess, and if I could have one wish, it would be that Judah finds someone deserving of everything he has to offer now.

He shifts in his seat to face me. "I want you to know I'm not doing this so you'll take me back. I know you won't. I know you've moved on, and the only thing left for me to do is to make sure I protect what's left of us." He gives me half a smile, but it's still so sad it makes my heart ache. "I want to be friends with you, and try to be supportive even if it's hard. I can't imagine my life without you in it, and I hate even more when you're sad, so I want to make sure you get to be happy."

"I want you to be happy, too," I whisper.

He bites the inside of his cheek and nods. "Yeah, I'm working on that."

I take his hand, lacing my fingers through his. "I can't think of a single person who would do what you're doing. It's the opposite of selfish and if you're doing it because you feel like you need to make up for something, I want you to know you don't have to. I forgive you. We all make choices we regret, and I don't blame you for it."

Judah stays quiet for the longest time, staring down at our hands. His face is shadowed in the darkness of the cab of his truck so I can't fully read his expression. After another moment, he sighs.

His eyes flick up to mine. "It's hard to walk away from something you thought you'd always have, but I can see how much you love him." He laughs once. "It fucking kills me, but I would never take that away from you. You deserve to be happy, Elle." He gives my hand a squeeze and finally smiles a little. "That's why I'm doing this."