Neon Black

7: A gift

I can hear them, talking about me. I hear it underneath the words they're saying. I can hear it in the tone they use, in the way that they pause and in the way that they look at me.

"I think your friend should be here soon." The guard says when he sees me starring at them.

"Thanks." I reply. 

Like I know who they're talking about, like I know what's happening. But I'm scared, and shocked and confused and so many other things I can barely think straight. And I have no idea who is coming to get me. All my memories are running together and I don't know what to trust anymore. Just moments ago I was feeling happy and elated that I was about to be in sunlight but now I am here. My clothes are clean, no wound on my head and no longer thirsty. Before in that other place, I was tired and exhausted and empty of anything other than a desire to move forward into the light. But now I'm here all the emotions from the train have come rushing back in.

Through the rain and the cars and the noise of the city I hear someone shouting out my name.

"Ever!"

I look out into the night and see someone, waiting for a chance to cross holding an umbrella. And as they cross the street running towards me I see it is Lenore. My roommate. And by the time she's close enough that I can see the cupcakes and bananas printed on her pyjamas, all the emotions I've been feeling come rushing out and I start to cry. As I feel her arm wrap around me and water from her hair falling onto my face all I can think about is that I'm crying in the middle of the city in front of a train station.

"Hey, baby girl. You're okay. I'm here now." She rubs my back and holds me close. "Come on let's get you home." 

And between the sobbing and the relief I feel myself nod. All I want to do is go home and sleep in a familiar place with my things and where I feel safe. Lenore shakes off her umbrella and takes my bag from my shoulder as I let the blanket drop to the ground.

"Do you ... have they got what they need?" Lenore says, nodding over in the direction of the guards.

"I ... I don't know. I'm not sure." I say. Which is the truth. I don't know what's happened. I'm not certain of anything anymore.

"It's okay." She says, walking over to the men. "Do you need anything else from her?"

"No, it's a waiting game now. The police have been and gone and they have her statement and description. We'll pull the footage from the cam on the train and should have something by the morning. —"

When did that all happen? I think. I don't remember any of that. I know I haven't spoken to any police. But what does that mean then, that what he's saying isn't real and that place I woke up in was? Is that what I think?

"— She's been real strong this one." He finishes, smiling at me. He seems kind and strong and reminds me of my father. And I start crying again.

"We really need to get you home." Lenore says, coming back over to me.

"And if you remember anything else Miss Black you can feel free to give me a call too." The guard says.

"Yeah. Sure, I can do that. Do you have a card or something?" I ask.

He smiles at me, a caring look of sympathy and understanding on his face.

"It's all in your phone"

My phone? I pat my hand down my pocket and feel my phone there. I pull it out and the screen lights up with missed calls and messages and I'm more confused than ever.

"I thought ... I — " I unlock it and see it's almost 11:30 pm and my phone is charged to 30%.

"— it was flat. I know it was. I —"

"You charged it here Ever. In my office and we used it call you friend. Remember?"

"No, I ... all of this I don't —" and I feel it rising within me, my chest tightening and feeling like everyone is too close and I can't breath. And suddenly I just want to get away from everything, but as I start walking backwards I hear the automatic doors start to slide open and my heart starts racing faster. There's no way I'm going back in there. The anxiety is so intense I can't stop shaking.

"Get. Me. Out of here." I gasp out to Lenore. To anyone who will listen.

Lenore holds me as I try to calm down and as the world rushes around me. After a few minutes a car pulls up and the guard hops out.

"I'll take you to your campus it isn't far."

I force myself to remain calm as they help me inside the car. I hear Lenore and the guard talking as we drive toward campus, but I can't figure out the words. I am lost and alone, surrounded by people yet completely alone. 

In a short time we arrive at the steps in front of our dorm. Lenore and the guard help me out and I'm one step closer to being home. As I cross the threshold into the common area and nothing happens to me, I feel something within me ease. Maybe it was all in my head? A momentary illusion brought on by too much red bull and coffee. As the guard goes to leave I reach and grab his arm, holding him a moment longer.

"Whats your name? ... Again? I can't seem —"

"Frank miss. Frank Adams."

"Well ... thank you Frank Adams. For everything."

And when Lenore and I walk up the stairs and she opens the door to our room most of my anxiety has left. By the time I've showered and changed into comfy clothes all I feel is tired.

I climb into bed, my body clean and tingling as I nestle into the sheets. Ready to sleep and forget all the confusion of today, I reach to turn off the lamp on my bedside table and that's when I see it.

Sitting right there, a black box. A black that I've never seen before, so dark it seems to absorb the light. And on top of the box a note. On the front are my initials, EB in ornate calligraphy and on the inside, in the same writing I read a message.

A gift, as promised.