Give Me All Your Hopeless Hearts // Frerard

November 3rd

        I text Gerard, saying I'm heading over to his house now. I still can't believe what happened on Friday. After a few rounds of hide and seek, the others surprised me. For my birthday, they all pitched in a bought a guitar. MY guitar, Pansy. Epiphone Wilshire Phant‑o‑matic. In ivory. I couldn't believe it and I honestly started crying, which confused them. I'm ever so grateful for my friends because they are so kind and wonderful. It's not because they bought me my guitar. They truly care and they coordinated it for me. I don't care about the guitar as much as the friends they are. Nobody's ever cared this much about me.

        It was Gerard's idea, he arranged the whole idea and was holding onto it in his closet since they got enough money to buy it. I felt sick to my stomach when I realized this was Gerard's doing. Not because of anything bad but because I think I actually love him. 

        Stepping outside, the air stings my face and I shudder from the cold. When it actually started snowing, my little jacket won't be doing enough to keep me warm. Well, I do have some extra cash on me now that I'm not saving for anything. I really need a job. Then again as terrible as it is, my parents about once a month give me a handful of money to "make up" for not always being there. At this point, I don't care. Well, I do but I don't. 

        I ring the doorbell but nobody answers. I text him again, saying I'm here and ring again. It doesn't make sense because his parents should be here. It's the same time as always. I call him and wait for him to answer. It rings and rings but he never picks up. It goes to his voicemail and I hang up. Weird. The cold starts getting to me so I head back to my house wondering.

        My father's in the kitchen when I step back inside. "What are you doing?" he asks. 

        "I-"

        "It's 40 degrees outside. Why aren't you wearing a thicker jacket?"

        "I don't really have one," I say. He stops and looks at me. "What?"

        "Why didn't you say anything?" I shrug. "You can't keep wearing that. It's going to start snowing." He goes to the front and looks around. "Here, you can wear my old one." 

        "Thanks," I say, taking it. 

        Footsteps sound from the stairs and my mother walks over. "Morning, Frank," she says. She glances at the coat. "That's your father's."

        "He needs one, it's cold outside."

        She opens her mouth, probably to yell for not providing me with my own. "Well, thanks! I got to go or I'll be late," I say, quickly leaving the house before any yelling can start. I run down the street back to Gerard's house. He hasn't replied to my texts yet. I ring his bell again but nobody answers. I need to go to Cody's house now or I'll be late. Granted, he'd pick me up if I didn't make it there on time. No need to cause any trouble. 

        I start jogging over to Jenna and Cody's house as they walk outside. "Hey, there you are," Jenna says with a smile. "I was just about to text you."

        "Sorry, I was waiting for Gerard and-" I stop when I see Cody give his head a small and discreet shake. "But I don't know."

        "Oh, he texted Cody, saying he was sick and staying home." That doesn't make sense. If he was sick, he'd still answer his phone. Unless he was sleeping but that still doesn't seem right. Someone would have answered the door. And he would've told me too like he told Cody. 

        "Yeah, well, let's go. Frank, sit up front," Cody says. The girls climb in the back and I get in the passenger. Amelia and Jenna are talking about a movie they want to see while Cody discreetly whispers to me. "Did Gee tell you anything?"