Count On Me | Niam

Chapter Eighty-One

Dropping onto the sofa, Liam closed his eyes for a moment, trying to relax and simply enjoy the time he had to himself, time that he hadn't had whilst he'd been away and wouldn't have for a while once he left again, opening his eyes and sighing as he jumped up, unable to let go and chill for a while, instead turning back to the piles of Niall's old belongings he'd yet to put away.

Niall's pile was significantly smaller than Chloe's, as though he'd been frugal about what he'd bought himself over the years or had allowed himself to keep, and Liam moved the collection of t-shirts, jumpers, books and an old box over to their room carefully, opening Niall's side of the wardrobe and deciding where it would be best to place things. He left the box untouched, vaguely recognising it as the box of personal memories Niall kept and figuring that if he was supposed to see what was in it, Niall would show him at some point, sliding the box up onto a shelf. The books found homes on the bookshelf in the living room, slotted neatly into rows of paperbacks Liam had stolen from Harry or bought in airport shops, and then Liam was left with only Niall's clothes to sort.

Niall's t-shirt collection left a lot to be desired, all of them being old and faded and some having small holes, and Liam made a mental note to trick Niall into going shopping at some point as he folded the t-shirts and put them away in the chest of drawers he'd had cleared out to make space for Niall. He started on the jumpers then, and he recognised a few of the hoodies, one in particular as his own that he must have left at Niall's late one evening and hadn't found until then, folding them and putting the clothes away until he eventually ran out of room and had to pull out a few of the draws to reorganise them.

Somehow, Liam managed to cram most of Niall's t-shirts and jumpers into three of the draws and turned on a fourth to fit the remaining few items into, pulling out the clothing Niall already had in there and then stopping in his tracks as he unearthed three pregnancy tests.

He stared at them, not sure if he was seeing things correctly, and then closed his eyes for a moment, as though he expected them to have vanished in the time it took for him to reopen them.

Why the fuck did Niall have used pregnancy tests?

And why was he hiding them?

Somewhere, a small part of Liam had already answered those questions, but it helpfully stayed silent, letting the rest of him come to the answer in his own time. The seemingly smarter part of him then cackled almost maniacally as he noticed the positive results, with each test bearing two little lines. It took Liam a while, but, eventually, his jaw dropped and he thought back, swearing under his breath as he remembered saying, "Fuck it."

Still somewhat stunned, Liam sat back, staring at the tests for a while before he started putting everything back away, hiding the tests back under the t-shirts and replacing the drawer, later finding himself sat in the kitchen, hunched over the table, tempted to go back and double check that he hadn't just imagined the tests, that they were definitely positive, that Niall had definitely hidden them away.

He stayed sat there for a long time, reliving every moment of the weeks Niall had been with him on tour, remembering snitching condoms from Zayn, cackling harshly that he wouldn't need them anyway and ducking as Zayn had thrown a shoe at him, but not for that first night. He already knew that, remembered everything, but he kept thinking over everything again and again.

Running a hand over his face, Liam tried to make himself slow down, tried to rationalise that maybe, somehow, it wasn't what he thought it was, that Niall would have told him otherwise, that it didn't mean anything for certain. Though...sort of, Liam hoped it did. He- He wanted this, he had, and he'd thought that he and Niall were working towards this, slowly, that it would have happened sooner or later - if it was what he thought it was.

But- It had only been months, this time around, with him and Niall. Maybe they'd rushed with everything. They hadn't been together, now, for even a year yet, but- But it felt like they had. That's why he'd suggested it, maybe. They were solid, they were living together, a family, Niall and him and Chloe, so why not? Why not give her a sibling? This...if this what he thought it was, then it was what he'd wanted. And it was what Niall wanted too, or at least what he had claimed to want.

Liam was still sat there when Chloe and Niall came home, having said goodbye to Sam at the door, not moving until Chloe found him and flung herself at him, beginning to babble on about her day and the school and her future classmates, one of whom liked Pokémon and how she couldn't wait until September so that she could start there properly and did he know that, 'the Vikings believed in a god called Thor, who was really powerful, like a legendary pokémon, as well as one called Loki' and 'was that why our Loki's called Loki? Or did you name him after a different Loki?'

He couldn't think of anything to say in answer to any of that, but Chloe ran off to her room to change before Liam could really answer anyway, leaving him alone with Niall, who simply gave him a tired smile before he launched into a barrage of his own questions about Liam's day and chatter about his own that Liam didn't really hear, simply too distracted as he tried to process everything that was swimming around inside his head.

It was all he could do not to stare blatantly at Niall, and he barely managed that, blinking a few times and inhaling sharply, giving up on not staring at Niall, unable to help himself as he blurted out, "Is there anything we need to talk about?"

Niall blanched, the smile fading from his face and his mouth hanging open, as though he was floundering, unable to find anything to say. He seemed to regain control after a second and swallowed, trying to shake his head. "What...what do you mean?"

The look of confusion on Niall's face was enough to throw Liam for a moment, and a small part of him began to wonder if he'd somehow impossibly gotten things wrong. The part of him that had had so much conviction and had worked things out before the rest of his brain engaged had helpfully fallen silent, leaving Liam to stare at Niall, desperately trying to keep focused. At any other time, he probably would have recognised Niall's bullshit for what it was and would have called him out on it, though Liam was currently busy trying to recapture the feeling of certainty he'd felt as he'd done the maths in his head. "You know what I mean. I found them, Ni. When I was unpacking. The tests. They were positive. All three of them."

Shaking his head, Niall tried to keep expression under controlled but failed, his bottom lip wobbling, staring at Liam with a look that was wholly unreadable before he looked away, tugging at his hair. "Fuck...fuck. You found them. I was going to tell you. I was, I swear. I just- I didn't know how. I didn't even know- Are you mad? You're allowed to be mad, you are. I didn't say- I- I'm sorry. I'm..."

Niall broke off suddenly, still refusing to look at Liam, his arms wrapped around himself and his jaw tightening as though he was trying not to cry. It got too much for Liam to bear, watching Niall beat himself up, and he jumped up from his seat, taking his hands, unable to quite comprehend what was happening as he said, "I- I'm not mad. I'm not. How could I be? You're- You are, though? Pregnant?"

The single nod Niall managed caused Liam to feel his stomach drop out of his body, pulling Niall in close and pressing a kiss to his temple. He couldn't bring himself to care about anything else other than Niall then, everything else falling away, seemingly irrelevant, at that moment, tightening his grip on Niall and running a hand across his back in slow circles when he heard the little gasps he was making, his tears dripping down onto Liam's t-shirt.

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So...the cat's out of the bag.

Weird phrase that, really.

And okay, Niall didn't man the fuck up. He should have, but he didn't, and the next chapter will sort of redeem him for that.

This week, I'm more interested in finding out if any of you watch Torchwood than asking you any real questions, because I'm watching it and I really need someone to cry over Captain Jack Harkness with.

Thoughts on the chapter?