~Part 13- Coming Home Again

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Nathan's POV:

I hung up my phone, sighing in frustration at Caroline for thinking so lowly of herself. She shouldn't think that she needs me to make her happy, but she does. I prayed that my manager would let me go to her to at least tell her I am sorry for making her feel like she can't live without me. I need to let her know that loving her has been the best decision of my life and her love for me should let her realize that I will never leave her alone.

I went to talk with my manager about this hoping what I told Caroline would be true. "Hey, Brad...I need to go see my wife now. She...um, she lost our baby." Brad looked at me disappointed, but by my surprise he said, "Yeah, go see her." My eyes widened and filled with tears and I replied, "Thank you." I ran to go pack up some things and I booked a flight that I had to be to in 30 minutes.

~Airport~

I got my ticket to board the plane and put all my packages where they were supposed to be. I sat down in my seat thinking about Caroline all worried about me, wondering if she cried all the time. I tried to think about her smiling and happy like before, but it was hard because I knew that once she would see me, she'd start crying uncontrollably.

~South Carolina~

Finally, the plane landed letting me see all the skyscrapers lights on. I started to feel anxious about seeing Caroline until her parents were the ones to drive up to the gate to pick me up. I walked up to the car and opened the door to the backseat and sat down buckling up. I placed my packages in the back and turned back around waiting for them to drive off.

*Home*

I ran out of the car and stepped onto the porch waiting for Mr. and Mrs. Barr to open the door. They unlocked the door and I walked in hoping to see Caroline, but I saw all the lights were off and then Sammy barked running down the stairs. I pet him, but then I walked upstairs and I heard Caroline crying. I opened her door and turned on her light seeing that she was still asleep. I walked over to her and gently nudged her and whispered, "Caroline, it's me you can wake up now." I climbed on the bed and touched her face wiping away her tears hoping she would wake up. I whispered her name again and her eyes fluttered open, widening at seeing me there next to her. She sat up hugging me tightly, I hugged her back and said, "It's okay now, I'm here." She whimpered burying her face into my chest and said, "I'm so sorry, I should've been okay without you." I loosened my grip on her and looked at her saying, "You don't need to be sorry." Caroline nodded replying, "Yes, I do. I caused us to lose our baby." I shook my head and said, "No, you didn't. You are okay, almost all first pregnancies end up like this." She nodded her head and laid down wiping away more tears that fell. I laid down next to her and held her gently, kicking off my shoes and getting under the covers with her.

~Morning~

When I woke up Caroline was awake smiling at me slightly. I reached out my hand and brushed her hair out of her face. She came closer to me and touched my arm making me look down at her hand there. I looked back up and saw her eyes were still filled with sadness and I pulled her body to mine leaving no space inbetween. Caroline hugged me back and I leaned closer to her face, suddenly feeling her lips on mine. I kissed back feeling the passion rolling off her body making me grip her shirt to bring her closer again.

As our kissing became intense, I rolled her over so I was on top. I touched down her torso to her hips and I could feel her squirming underneath, but I didn't want to stop. I felt her finger my hair and entangle them all through. Then she reached her other hand down my back, her nails scratching through my shirt making me groan. I then pulled away and I kissed her neck making her moan quietly, her fingers gripping my shirt tighter, pulling it up. I let her take off my shirt and her hand touched my chest feeling my heart beating rapidly. I looked at her and furrowed my eyebrows at the way she bit the inside of her cheek, seeing her nervousness. I asked, "What's wrong?" She opened her mouth, but no words came out like she couldn't find the words to tell me.

I coaxed her into telling me what was wrong and she said, "I wanted to make you happy." I closed my eyes and sighed not wanting to get upset and say the wrong thing. I replied, "I am happy with you." Caroline cried, "But, how can you be happy when we lost our child?" I started to feel myself shake, but I took a deep breath calming myself down and told her, "We can still be happy without a child right now." She nodded and started to wriggle out from under me, so I lifted myself up. She sat up and came to the edge of the bed and stood up. She walked over to the bathroom without any trouble luckily this time and I followed her. When I came in she was brushing her hair and the funny thing is, I noticed that her hair isn't as bright anymore. I touched her hair and she turned around to face me, looking at me solemnly and she hugged me resting her head on my chest.

~Later~

After Caroline showered, she came to the kitchen. When she sat down her mom came in and said, "Caroline, your dad and I wanted to let you know that tomorrow you are going to school." She looked at her mom with a blank expression and said, "I don't wanna go this quickly." Her mom said, "You're lucky that this college will let you in now, because the year has already started and some classes were still open." Caroline looked at me and said, "I wanna be with Nate." Her mom replied, "You can be with Nate, you will just be in school now." Caroline then said, "I don't know how to handle school and still grieving over our baby." Her mom said, "School will distract you from your grievances and remember, you are still young and have plenty of time to become a mom." She nodded and said, "I hope so." I stated, "You and I will be parents when the time is right." She looked at me irritatedly saying, "And when do you think that will be?" I shrugged, "I don't know, when your body can take it." She looked down and scoffed not really in the mood to hear someone disagree with her. Then she got up from the table and I could tell she was really annoyed with me making me feel anxious about her reaction to my decision about holding off on sex right now.

I got up and walked over to her and sat down touching her shoulder, making her turn around and she fell into my arms, punching my chest, crying and screaming. I just held her gently and after her punching was over, she just laid limp against me and cried loudly. I rubbed her back to sooth her and eventually she started to calm down, just letting her tears flow. She looked up at me and I wiped away her tears smiling at her, hoping that another temper tantrum wouldn't come up after I told her this. I sighed and said, "Caroline, I think that we should take a break from...making love." She looked at me confused and then she sighed. I took her face in my hands and asked, "Are you okay with that?" She replied, "I guess, I was just thinking that maybe we could use protection." I nodded and said, "I don't know, I think it's best if we just wait a little bit." I saw her smile a tiny bit and asked, "What?" She looked at me asking, "Are you sure you can handle that?" I scoffed nudging her a bit saying, "Yes, I can. Sex wasn't the only reason I married you." She chuckled and said, "I know that, I just trying to make myself laugh." I smiled at her and replied, "I'm glad you wanna try to be funny." Caroline responded, "I was hoping we could make love tonight though..." I looked at her and saw her blushing and trying to look away from me. I grabbed her face and told her, "I know it's been awhile, but I think that doing it right now would be too much." She looked into my eyes and saw the sincerity in them, telling her how much I cared that she was doing well and not expecting anything to happen now. Caroline hugged me again and I hugged her back just feeling our presence together.

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