Bad Liar

Chapter Two

His lips part and I feel relief. There. That was a reaction.

I take a step back when I realise what I just said, guilt flooding my body like a tsunami. I gulp, as something flashes across his eyes.

"Good to know you still hate me as much as I hate myself," is all he says, before pushing himself off the locker and striding away from me.

My legs give way and I fall onto the lockers beside me, shaking. I press my forehead against the cold metal, feeling disorientated.

Miles Carter is here. At my school. In my life.

I can only imagine that Finn is going to take this almost as well as I did.

***

As I re-enter class, a few people gave me weird looks.

I just realise that it must seem strange I took so long.

"Welcome back, Miss Collins," Mr Edgington drawls. "Thought you got lost."

A few people snicker and I would usually roll my eyes or say something back, but I am way too shaken.

Mr Edgington meets my eyes and realises something is wrong. I must look as bad as I feel. I can feel my body trembling. He walks over to me, frowning.

"Isobel, are you alright?"

Tears burn at my eyes and I shake my head.

"I think..." I gasp out. "I'm about to..." Another gasp. "Have a panic attack."

I have had a couple of panic attacks in my life, so now, I know when one is coming.

I shouldn't have come back to class, but it didn't really hit me, until I felt the eyes of my peers on me.

Samara shot up from her chair, grabbing our stuff and hastily moving towards me.

"I got this," she says to Mr Edginton, dragging me out of the room.

Each breath feels like a sharp, jabbing pain each time I inhale. We make it to the girl's bathroom, where Samara drops our books onto the tiled floor. I can feel my cheeks burning. I strip my coat off, tugging at the collar of my school shirt.

"I - can't - breathe," I rasp, clawing at my throat.

Samara grabs me again, her fingers biting into my shoulders. The last time I had a panic attack, Ashley had been the one to help me. She showed Samara what to do, in case it ever happened again.

"Hey," she says softly, staring intently into my eyes. "You're okay. Just try and relax. Focus on your breathing. Deep inhale, then exhale, okay?"

I nod weakly, staring into her eyes, trying to calm my breathing.

That didn't work. On to option two.

I shake my head, stepping back, feeling light-headed. If I don't gain control of my breathing, I am going to faint, like I have before.

"How many fingers am I holding up?" she asks. "Let's count together."

She holds up two fingers.

"Two," I choke out.

She holds up another.

"Three." It is a little easier to talk this time.

She continues and by the time we get to ten, I can feel my heart beat slowing. I finally take in a deep breath, feeling dizzy. I grip the bathroom sink, my knees knocking together.

"What the hell caused that kind of panic attack?" she exclaims once I return to semi-normal. "Jesus, you scared the hell out of me."

Thinking about Miles being in the same building as me right now, almost makes me have another one. I squeeze my eyes closed as I let out a big breath.