Not That Kind of Change

Not That Kind of Change Chapter 1

          “Casey?” Nick looked at me with passionate beautiful piercing blue eyes.

          “Yes?” I turned my body to face his, now, our bodies were touching.

          “I love you.”

          “I love you too.” I smiled, then, he kissed me. I felt all passion that was roaming between us within the last few moments. He gave me this amazing sensational feeling, my heart pounding, I really do love him. My eyes were just bolted shut, I let him kiss me. He leaned over more so the top half of him was on top of me, but his lips never unlocked from mine. His hand slid up and down my side, at first I felt like it was nothing, but then it clicked on me what he was going forward to try and do. I wasn’t going to stop him, I have wanted to for a while, but I knew it was wrong. I would feel horrible to stop. I let him continue even though every minute and every move he made had made me feel more regret. I would feel like an idiot to make him stop, I knew I would pay for this.     

          Nick’s hand kept sliding, he reached my thigh. Then I really started to feel regret, and shame, not to mention scared. I can’t believe I am letting it go this far.           

          “Nick?” I opened my eyes and pushed him away for a moment.

          “Yeah Case?” He looked at me.

          “I…I don’t know.” I stuttered.

          “Don’t be scared, it’s ok I promise.” He tried hard to convince me everything was going to be ok but I was still really tense. I was scared but I tried hard to calm down, I even tried to let him continue hoping I would forget about being scared and let it happen. Though I just really wanted to stop. But, I was too late, we went all the way.        

          His hands motioned onto my stomach under my shirt and around my back, he lifted me and turned me over on top of him and my shirt stayed behind me.

          “You’re beautiful.” He glared at me with passionate eyes, now I was gaining confidence that things were going to be ok.

          I felt amazing, still scared but by the time I actually began to feel relaxed, it was over. I can’t believe we went all the way, I never imagined this, and it was unbelievable.

          “Are you ok?” He slightly sat up and looked over towards me.

          “Uh, yeah, I’m ok.” I stood up and I decided I would get into my pajamas because now it was after 11 p.m. I was totally exhausted. I lied back down on the bed next to him, I got under the blanket and faced away from him, I seriously could not believe what just happened. I tried to get my mind away from it, I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep. My dream had been horrible, in fact it was a nightmare. My nightmare was a repeat of what happened and then I was pregnant, I was in the middle of the part when I was looking at the + sign on the test, that is when I woke up and screamed in the middle of the night.

          Nick flew up, “Are you ok?!”

          I panted and I looked at him, “Yes… I’m fine.”

          “Why did you scream then?”

          “Uh, bad dream.”

          “Casey are you sure you are ok? You have been weird for the last few hours.”

          “I don’t know, I just didn’t expect to do that Nick, and I didn’t think of anything about it until now. I’m sorry.”

          “Don’t be, it’s my fault and I shouldn’t have tried anything, I just thought that it would be sort of romantic if we did it on our 1 year anniversary.”