Lost in the Fight

Chapter 37 - Free as a Burden

Seeing the somber expression on his older brother's face, Donatello nervously lifted up the blanket that was covering him and stared down at the bandages affixed to his lower plastron.

"How bad was it?" Placing his hand over the stark white bandages, Donnie traced his fingertips along the tape securing the gauze in place. The dressing around the wound was about the size of a compact disc case.

"You had a two-and-a-half inch piece of thick, rusty metal buried in your side, Donatello. I don't know about you, but I would qualify that as really bad." With that said, Leo pressed his lips into a thin line, like he was trying to hold something back.

The lack of pleasantry in his big brother's voice was making Donnie even more uncomfortable than his wounds were. Actually, now that the brainy turtle had a moment to stop and think about it, none of his wounds were bothering him one little bit. He was guessing that meant his brothers had given him something to ease his discomfort. Either that or he was finally getting so used to being in agony all the time, he had lost his ability to discern pain from any other sensations.

Feeling himself starting to get sidetracked, Donnie focused his attention on his side once again.

"Fascinating. The blast wave from the explosion must have generated enough pressure that it propelled the piece of metal towards me at a highly accelerated rate and the concussive force embedded it into my plastron. It's actually what's called a secondary blast injury, but it's better known as a shrapnel wound." Instead of being disturbing by the injury like his brothers had been, Donnie sounded intrigued by it. He was talking about the incident like it was some sort of interesting experiment he had been conducting.

Leo shook his head in disbelief.

"Donatello, we had to remove a big hunk of metal from your side that came extremely close to causing serious internal damage! It could've easily killed you! Forgive me if I don't find it all that fascinating."

One look at Leonardo told Donnie that his oldest brother was trying desperately to rein in his anger, but it was pretty obvious that the leader was struggling to keep his rage at bay. That was probably because Donnie had given his brother so many reasons to be enraged with him.

"You could have gotten yourself killed going after the Foot on your own like that. You know where there's one Foot, there's usually more lurking in the shadows. You could have been walking straight into a trap."

"I expect that kind of reckless behavior from Raph, but not you. You're supposed to be the smart one."

"What you did was incredibly dangerous and stupid, all right. Here I thought Mikey was the bonehead of the family."

All of the unkind things that kept echoing inside of Donatello's head were constantly lending themselves to other applications and situations. It seemed like the hurtful phrases were relevant to every little screw up that he made.

Maybe that's because you keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again, shell brain!

It was no wonder Leo was mad at him. Donnie had goofed up so many times now, he had lost count.

"No . . . No, I suppose you wouldn't given the circumstances." The genius turtle's voice trailed off guiltily as he got that sad puppy look in his eyes. It was a look that would normally soften Leonardo's disposition when he was ticked off about something, but not this time. The leader's face appeared to be locked in an eternal scowl, which caused Donnie to start shifting on the cot uneasily. He knew that scowl all too well.

"Listen, Leo, I'm really sorry. I know I messed up, again. I'm sure Raph was a total train wreck because of me." Not wanting his big brother to see the tears gathering in the corners of his eyes, Donnie turned his face away. In doing so, the wounded turtle's gaze fell upon the ugly scar on his shoulder. The mark was normally covered up by his sling, but right now, it was out in the open for all to see. Donnie couldn't stop himself from staring at the unsightly disfigurement.