Zahara
"Mommy!"
I turned away from the stove and gave Zari my undivided attention. She woke up at 5am and demanded eggs for breakfast, I tried convincing her that waffles would be better being as though I could just pop them in the toaster oven. It didn't work, so I'm up cooking breakfast at five o'clock in the morning. Otherwise she would have gone on and on about the eggs until I finally gave in.
"Yes Zari?"
"What's that noise?"
"It's the music to Josiah's swing"
"Okay"
His swing has a few different noise settings and right now it sounds like rain, it switches occasionally which helps him sleep. He loves taking a nap in that swing, he was upstairs but he woke up not long after Zari came barging into my room. But thankfully after a nice warm bottle and a diaper change he went back to sleep. I'm hoping that Zari goes back to sleep as well, I didn't get much sleep. Josiah has been giving me such a hard time at night lately. He started sleeping longer throughout the night about two weeks ago, it was amazing. But as lately he wakes up what seems like every hour fussing. I know he's not hungry or wet so it gets frustrating not knowing why he's fussing in order to calm him.
Most nights he just wants to be held, which is fine because I can still rest my eyes with him on my chest. And then some nights he will scream and scream until I walk around singing and rocking him. He's spoiled rotten and I'm beyond worn out having to stay up all night only to have Zari wake up me the moment I close my eyes. But it's all in the life of a mother so I don't really complain much. Zari got up from her table and started walking towards Josiah and immediately I kind of got nervous. I don't want him to wake up fussy, I would love to go back to sleep once she eats breakfast.
"Zari'ana...."
She turned around as she reached out to touch his forehead, I pointed to her little table so she'd go back and sit down. Instead of listening she began rubbing Josiah's head and kissing him. I took her head off his head and allowed her to give him his fifth and last kiss. I don't know what it is but she loves trying to touch his head which is something I don't allow her to do.
"Mommy, stop"
"You stop. Leave your brother alone he's sleep"
"He's mine"
"Girl.."
She sat down in her chair with an attitude but she'll be okay, in about five minutes she's gonna get up like nothing ever happened. I turned the stove off and sat the pan with the sausage in it to the side. I made this child sausage, eggs with cheese and a pancake at five in the morning. All while knowing at about nine she's gonna be asking for cereal or more eggs and pancakes. I sat a plate in front of Zari and decided to fix my own food aside from the plate I made for Justin. He should be coming downstairs any minute, he's been up since four thirty because he has to work at six.
I caught myself falling asleep a few times while trying to eat, its really hard to fight your sleep when you're extremely tired. It almost seems impossible nothing seems to help with trying to keep my eyes open. I'm really praying that once we get upstairs Zari decides to go back to sleep. I opened my eyes when I felt a hand on my lower back. Just leaned down and kissed my cheek before sitting in the chair next to me with his plate.
