delivered

100

phil flinches slightly as his teeth tear the already bitten flesh of his lower lip, and his fingers tighten around the soft material of the jacket in his hands as he quietly approaches a completely oblivious dan. phil watches as dan's legs bob up and down impatiently, his eyes fixed on the cloudless sky and his forehead a mess of uncountable curls.

when phil is three feet away, and his shoes scruff against a dry patch of mud, is when dan breaks free from his trance, his cheeks blooming a soft pink and his rosy lips pursed as he looks at phil; coffee eyes drowning in spoonfuls of concern.

"a-are you okay?" dan asks hurriedly, his voice small as he gets off the bench and quickly rushes to phil, both his hands involuntarily gripping phil's arms, before he lets go and steps back, the blush on his cheeks dripping down slowly towards the collar of his shirt and staining his neck.

"i'm fine," phil answers, staring at dan for a moment before holding out the jacket in his hands, and dan just furrows his eyebrows for a moment.

"it's cold and you're clearly not wearing enough clothes," phil rolls his eyes, and dan flushes, thanking him quietly before pulling the sleeves over his arms and letting the heavy fabric sit on his shoulders-the faint scent of phil, the smallest spray of his cologne, the unmistakable trace of mint makes dan feel more at home than he actually does in the apartment.

his body grows warmer, cheeks grow pinker, and his eyes almost drop shut because he has been desperately longing for comfort since whatever happened between him and phil. he feels slightly pathetic for being this comforted by a simple article of clothing, but the way phil's jacket seems to hug him carefully-he refuses to think about it too much as he submerges more of himself into the lone piece of cloth.

"are you okay? i'm sorry i said too much," phil breaks the silence after a while, his glassy eyes shielded with his thick black rimmed glasses, and his dark hair branching all over his forehead and dan just looks at him worriedly before breathing out a sigh, a small puff of mist forming in front of his mouth at the gesture.

"no you didn't, it's okay, i'm okay," dan reassures him and phil nods half heartedly, moving his gaze back to the boy in front of him. the tip of his nose is tinted pink, his mouth is curled into a small smile and his eyes are staring back at phil with so many emotions that phil has to look away.

he can't physically stop himself from being close to dan right now-even though he is so mad at him, and he is so hurt, and he is so confused and angry and anxious-he still wants to hold dan and he wants dan to tell him that he won't actually do something like that, something that would forbid phil from ever trying to build a relationship with him again because its too late.

he shakes the thought out of his head and pushes his hair off his forehead, eyes drifting from dan to the dewy grass beneath their feet, and from the green fence of the park, back to dan again.

there are so many silences between them-dan's mistake, phil's insecurity, adrian, phil breaking down on the phone, phil's mother-and dan doesn't know which one to break. he watches phil instead, his soft pink lips roughly bitten and his soft blue eyes harshly guarded, and his soft pale hands mercilessly shaking.

"phil?" dan breaks one of the silences, but he doesn't know which one. phil looks at him, his movements traced with fear and his eyes filled with worry and dan wants to step forward and hold phil close to him and tell him that he doesn't need to worry about dan, but he isn't very sure if phil would appreciate that so he stays where he is, pressing his heels firmly into the grass to stop himself from leaping forward.

"um, cookies?" dan pushes the tupperware container towards phil and his heart almost glues itself back into place once the smallest and the warmest smile breaks through his lips and he shakes his head fondly before stepping forward.

"idiot," phil mutters before slowly sliding his arms around dan's waist and locking them tightly in place to hold the younger boy as close as possible, and dan just gasps slightly at the spontaneity, the tupperware box falling on the soft bed of grass underneath. his arms wrap around phil's shoulders and his forehead nestles into the crook of phil's neck, and when phil tightens his grip just a little, dan breaks down into the littlest sob, his fingers clutching phil's sweater tightly.

"i'm glad you're okay," phil mumbles into the bush of curls on dan's head and dan steps as close to phil as possible, his head moving further against phil's neck as he nuzzles his face into the soft skin.

"i'm sorry, i'm so sorry, please forgive me," dan cries pathetically, and phil doesn't reply, he just loosens his grip slightly and attempts to take a step back but dan doesn't cooperate, shaking his head violently against phil's sweater and pulling him back.

"dan-"

"please i love you, i didn't mean to-"he hiccups, and phil involuntarily rubs his palms softly against dan's back. "i didn't mean to hurt you phil, i really didn't, and i can't live without you please don't leave me,"

--

sorry this was incredibly shitty and incredibly rushed but i just wanted to update to thank you guys for

2 MILLION

WHAT THE FUCK