Sapphire

Sapphire {3}

Sorry its more filler than anything. I couldn't figure out how to manage 2-3 pages of space battle. My space terminology isn't that advanced i'm afraid so I had to settle with the after battle. Let me know what you think all the same!

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"Ok. So it could have been worse." I said nonchalantly while I surveyed the damage done during the battle with the ExpressJet. Jockie and Sapphire were at my side, looking at the smoking wreck.

"Worse? How the bloody hell could it be worse?! Our engine is shot, we didn't get the loot and we crashed on a Penile Colony!" Jockie screeched, his arms waving wildly in the air. I looked at him with one eyebrow raised. I had the distinct feeling he would be tearing at his hair next.

"Er well, yes....quite. But then again, what do we have to worry about? We're Pirates!" I said with a debonair grin if I do say so myself.

"Penile Colony?" asked Sapphire with a confused look upon her precious features while she looked curiously about.

"Penile as in convicts my dear." I told her gently.

"Oh." She said dispassionately. Was that a moue of disappointment I thought I saw on her pretty bow lips? I scowled at the thought of her looking forward to a whole planet of, erm, available male anatomies.

"Well then. As I said...its not that bad. For one, what kind of Pirates would we be if we were afraid of a few convicts? For two...okay I got nothing for two, but still!" I said exasperated. Haven't they ever heard of looking on the bright side of things?

"At least were not dead right?" I said to Jockie with a placating tone. He just kept staring me down. I checked myself to make sure I wasn't smoking from the intensity of it.

"Right... Forgive me for overseeing the fact that we have a busted ship that can't fly at the moment therefore leaving us stranded on a planet of convicts...But at least I still got both my legs. What was I thinking?" Jockie said snidely.

"Okay, there is no need to be sarcastic! These things happen in our trade. It's one of the downsides of our career choice." I wasn't about to say it was his own damn fault for having failed to dodge that last gun blast. I was afraid he might have an aneurysm at the mention.

And okay, I might have been able to shoot out their guns a little bit more instead of writing my name along the side of their ship with my lasers...

"Enough of this. This is getting us nowhere. Where is the engineer? Kathy!" I shouted.

"It's Katie!" said I disgruntled voice behind me.

I yelped and spun around to look into the pissed off face of my engineer. My, did she always look like a bulldog with a bad case of gas?

"Er, right...sorry, Katie. Can you fix it?" I said waving to the obviously steaming engine that lay in ruins.

Katie pushed me out of the way and started surveying the engines. She kept muttering under her breath and a few of them sounded like some pretty offensive references to my parentage, my manhood and my overall skill at the guns.

I took offense at the last. I was an excellent marksman. But, considering she pulled out a blade from her boot and started picking through the wiring of the engine board, I didn't think it was the best time to mention that fact.

"So, can you fix it?" I asked again after I had inched forward and started looking over her shoulder. She sat up quickly from her position and knocked into me, making me nearly fall on my arse. She turned to give me an aggravated look.

"I got this hunk of junk to fly the last time you crashed us, didn't I?" she answered glibly.

"The last time?!" Sapphire exclaimed in shock. Of course, let her pick up on that little tidbit.

"It was nothing." I told her with my most charming smile. I turned back to see Jockie and Katie both looking at me with their hands on their hips, their faces saying louder than words 'who are you trying to kid?'

"What? It wasn't that bad! And that one wasn't my fault...I was trying to avoid the asteroid. It was a choice between being smashed into with a giant rock or crashing into that Fuel Station. The Fuel Station seemed the lesser of two evils at the time." They just shook their heads disappointingly and turned back to the faulty engine.

I turned to see Sapphire looking at me with an expression close to apprehension.

"There is nothing to worry about, I assure you. It really wasn't my fault and it doesn't happen that often." I tried to reassure her. I don't think it worked. Damn staff...what did I pay them for? You think they could keep some blasted details to themselves.

"Well, good news is that I can fix it." Stated Kelly, wiping her hands off on her coveralls. "The bad news is that you're going to have to find me some parts. I'll write you a list." She started walking back to the ship.

"Wait, Kelly -

"It's Katie!" She yelled over her shoulder.

"Er...sorry, Katie. Where are we supposed to find parts on a Penile Colony?" I asked after her retreating back.

"The convicts got here somehow, Captain, and I'm sure the guards don't stay here all the time. They must have a place they fix their own ships. It's only general items I need so it's not like you need a specialty shop." She shot back over her shoulder.

"I'm afraid to break it to you, but we are Pirates on a Penile Colony! A little too close to home there, if you ask me. Besides, I highly doubt they'd be willing to sell it. What then, hmm?" I preened slightly. I had her there.

"As you said Captain...we're Pirates. I suggest you start Pirating." And with that, she walked back into the ship, the door shutting with a resounding slam. I stared hopelessly around me and heaved a giant sigh.

Of all the rotten luck, I just had to crash on a Penile Colony.

"Come on Jockie, let's go." I said as I turned and started heading back to the ship.

"Where are we going?" He asked astounded, looking from the smoking engine to me.

"Obviously we aren't flying anywhere you dolt! We're going to grab some men, wait for dark and scavenge for parts you ninny! I want off this island as soon as possible." I turned to Sapphire at that.

She had been quiet throughout most of this...well, other than her gripping my arm for dear life during our crash and her screaming we were going to die while we plummeted towards the approaching planet. I think it was acceptable for someone's first crash...I had done the same myself if I remembered properly.

"Come, my dear." I placed my hand at the base of her back and guided her into the ship.

"How long do you think we will be here, Master?" she asked curiously.

"Call me Roarke, sweetheart. And that all depends on how well we succeed tonight."

If all went well, I wouldn't be spending my life here inside a set of granite walls.