Heart of A Woman

part 3

I want to ask you... have you ever experienced a vision about your relationship before? Well its happen to me. In that dream i am holding the womans hair using my left hand and my right hand is holding a stick with a fire and ready to burn her hair. How did i know my husband is cheating behind me? Well its what a woman's call the instinct of a wife.

I told him this dream and he reassure me that its only a dream. One week after that he confessed to me,

"I want to tell you something Ade but dont be angry with me. I met a girl from this area and i know his dad. She actually begged me to be with her and told me that she wants to meet you(me) if you want (like hell i want!!  crazy bastard) And the girl want to marry me too. Im telling u this to get a permission and ask your opinion"

"(What the fuck are you saying you crazy asshole ..now divorce me!!!😂😂 thats what i want to say but the idiot me is still being cool and considerate) Well its totally a bullshit, my opinion is the girl have been having sex with other guy and maybe she is pregnant and searching for a 'pak sanggup'. But if you still insist then divorce me and marry her"

Then the story about the girl ended but its still shaken me to the core.

Then he started to change, this happens after his threat to me. He was becoming so arrogant and started to drink alcohol and stayback until nightime and came back so drunk and I was crying all the time. He even have sex with me drunk, and that makes me cry even more. At this time i always blame myself because for not able to get pregnant. This happens during i was actually taking a one year course and need to move for one year at another district 2 hours from my hometown. I sense the change and its taken toll on me. Despite all this ive got 3.72 for my CGPA lol😂.

During the Raya Festivities i accidentally awoke at night and stumbled upon my husband phone and i read the text and it contains the word sial a lot and lot of swearing but the words that crushed my heart...

"You already slept with me and now you just want to throw me like a garbage?!!!!!!"

And i run to the toilet and thinking what should i do? I went to my husband and ask him (until now i regret for not taking the phone number at that time, maybe things could have change for the better...or maybe not)

He actually told me,
" Its actually my friends girl, i was just trying to help her because she is so pitiful and bla bla bla..."
Well just shoot me hahaha. And of course i just agreed with his lie, but i dont believe him anymore. After i came back from the holiday i continue with my student life and start to think. In the end I was actually thinking about divorcing him. At the end of December i told him that maybe we need to separate. Of course he threatened to kill himself...yeah right.

March is ending and i complete my study and comeback to work. After came back to my workplace i really feel stressed with the situation and asking and pray to Allah swt to show me and give me a sign if i should divorce him or not.

One week later i was pregnant.

Oh before that during my study course my husband actually haunted me again with a new woman called Amanda. She is an interim at his workplace and a divorcee, and he ask for my permission to marry her because he really want to get a child.
Of course i told him okay but divorce me first. He actually has threatened me about Amanda like,

"Ade!! faster where the hell are you?? If i want i can easily went to AMANDA'S HOUSE AND STAY AND SLEEP THERE!!".