𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 - 𝐉𝐉𝐊 √ (Rewritten)

0.1

I opened my eyes at the loud yelling under the roof I'm living. Pushing in my fingers in my earhole, forcing them to stop myself from hearing screaming, wall punching, vase throwing, chair-throwing, and more likely one of my parents will walk out of the house with a loud bang on the door while the remaining one will drink in a bottle of liquor.

I don't even want to guess who's who this time, cause all I know is that they will never change and I will never learn to understand the word love.

Maybe the word love is more to hate cause I feel nothing than hatred towards my bloodline. I only know how to survive on a daily basis before I fall into a deep slumber of darkness and then open my eyes to the bright sunlight and then keep on my smiling face in school.

That's how I will continue to live. A person who is faking her smiling face.

A girl with a mask.

Ah...

I remembered how I said I don't want jungkook to fall for a girl who wears a mask. Did I mean myself too? Did I include myself as the person under a white mask? Am I also lying to him?

I drag my heavy legs to the school, the only place I could escape the screaming from the remaining one in our house. I don't feel like smiling anymore. Everything is shit. Every single person that I love is slowly flying away from my grasp.

Everyone is turning their backs on me as if I was never there, to begin with. Even him, even the person who I truly love will eventually leave me alone too. I don't want to fall behind; I don't want to be alone.

"Hey, sunshine!" I jump back by surprise when jungkook suddenly pops in front of me. Holding his bag with one hand, he smiles widely at me. He can smile easily while I feel like I'll be nailed down to the floor every time I smile.

I wish I could be free like you.

I want to be with you.

Jungkook's eyes turn darker when he realizes I'm not responding to him, "What happened? Why are you sad?"

He notices me. Of course, he did, he's been my friend since we're kids, with a person like him besides me, I know I should be grateful and enjoy his company but with the way my house is, I don't think I can enjoy life as much as he does.

"Nothing." I shrug his worried face and keep on walking; I don't understand why my legs are heavier than always. Why do I feel like the world is like a spinning disco ball? The straight line on the road starts to look like a snake.

My legs suddenly gives up to my weight and Mr. Gravity took the cue to pull me on the road. But before I could feel pain, his warm hands holds my weak body, "What's wrong with you?" My hands push him away while my dry lips move together, asking him.

"You tell me what the hell is wrong with you?!" Jungkook with a frustrated face was pushed two steps away from me.

I wipe my face angrily, with gritted teeth I said, "I don't know what's wrong with me too."

I can't waste my energy arguing over something stupid. I need to study; I need to get good grades maybe then they will look at me as proud parents. Maybe then, I could feel the love I once had when I was a baby.

"You're burning up." Jungkook touches my forehead carefully but I don't want his touch right now.

I slap his hands away, "I'm fine." Glaring angrily at the way he shines even in my dark world. "I'm really confused right now... What the hell is wrong with you today?" Jungkook frustratedly asks, he's looking more stressed than before.

"And I told you I don't fucking know!" This is the first time I raised my voice at him, both of us looks shocked at my outburst. Everyone around us looks interested in our fight, who wouldn't? when the most favorable friends are having a huge fight in front of the school.

Holding my burning forehead, I look at him with teary eyes. "Don't talk to me today." With that, I walk away from his shocked state. I fucked up. Now, we can't be friends anymore. I've always been careful with my words so why the hell did I fucked up today? Why can't I control my anger today?

I can't let him know how fucked up my life is. It's better for us to stop talking than he sees the disaster world I live in.

"I'll stop talking after I send you to the nurse." Suddenly two strong arms sweep me off the floor and carry me to the opposite building where I'm supposed to be right now. I move my legs like a rebellious kid, trying to run away from his grip even though I'm in the air and I could fall in any moment.

"Stop moving y/n!" Jungkook's deep voice scared me. It's like he's in a ticking bomb mode and could explode at any moment. "Then, let me go to class!"

"Fuck the class y/n."

"I can't fuck the class jungkook. My life depends on my grades!" I yelled at him again but this time he didn't show any reaction, instead he bite his lips, holding back words I could never predict to come out.

"And my life depends on you." With that he leaves me alone in the nurse room, crying alone like a newborn baby before fainting from exhaustion.

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-To Be Continue-

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