I can't even bring myself to say anything to him until I calm myself down, so I head right up to our bedroom and pace a little before plopping down on the bed. I wince a little as I sit down, remembering that my butt is probably skinned. I only look like I had the ultimate fight with the sidewalk...and lost.
I'm examining my hands when I hear a sharp intake of breath. "Shit, did you kill her?"
I look up at him and he throws his hands up in surrender. "Okaayy, so I take it it went we-"
"Why did you tell me to invite her?" I cut him off. "You know how she feels about me and you thought it would be smart to invite her to the wedding? Why do you think it's so important to fix our relationship?"
He looks taken aback by my outburst. I don't know why I'm using him as an outlet for my anger, but. "I...um. I know your mum is important to you, despite everything going on and I just thought-"
"You just thought that she would somehow have a change of heart?" I blurt. "After three years of despising me, you thought she would be like 'sure, Charlie. I'll come to the wedding! Do you want a fucking microwave or a fucking vacuum cleaner as your gift?!"
"I-"
"Or did you think that the kids need a relationship with her? Because let me tell you, they don't need her- they're perfectly fine without her. There are plenty of people who love them!"
"Uh-"
"Stop trying to fix this! This can't be fixed because she's a...a fucking monster!"
"I-why are you screaming at me?" He asks calmly. His hands are out in front of him like I'm gonna strike him at any time. I mean, I might.
"I don't know!" I shout. "I'm so God damned mad!" I slam my fists on the bed. "Ouch."
He takes his chances and walks the few steps over to me, placing his hands on my shoulders. "Breathe. You're gonna wake my babies up and I finally got them down for their afternoon naps. They drove me fucking nuts today."
I close my eyes. My nostrils are flaring, I'm sure. "Fuck," I mutter. I didn't want to cry over this because she's most definitely not worth it. But damn it to hell if she doesn't bring out the worst in me.
"I know, love," he consoles, pulling me flush against him. "It fucking sucks when your parents aren't the people who you need them to be. You think, like, well hell, if the people who brought me into this world can't even stand me, then I must be a fuckup- that clearly, you're the problem." I just sniffle. "But when it comes down to it, babe, people are shitty and that doesn't exclude those closest to us. And you're quite special so it's her loss if she doesn't want you in her life."
"I hate her."
"You don't, though," he counters. "And that, my whale, is the worst part of it all."
"Yeah, well, she hates me."
"She doesn't hate you, baby. She's just...she's probably angry at herself for fucking up with both of her children so she projects it onto you."
Well lucky me.
I blink up at him. "When did you become so smart? And stick up for my mother?"
"Hey I resent that. I've always been smart," he chuckles. "And as far as your mum is concerned, I don't like her. I'll never like her and she can kiss my whole entire ass that I don't have. And I'd bet money on that being a mutual feeling." I snort at that as his jaw clenches "Now I'm particularly pissed off about your skinned-up palms. Because if she put her fucking hands on you jaan, I swear I'm gonna lose my shit."
Chapter 57
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