It's an F'ed Up World and It's No Two-Player Game ~ Boyf rieds (Be More Chill)

Then You Go Off Track and Stray Off Course

Michael is the hottest guy.

You mean Michelle. Also, you just said that our loud.

What?!

"Did I just say that out-"

Suddenly, Chloe grabs my face and kisses me hard, despite me pulling away.

Make it stop!

I don't understand the request.

"Do you wanna stop? Do you wanna get inside my diaper~?"

She puts the bottle in my hand.

"It's not actually milk~" she slurs.

"I'm not really a big-"

Drink it.

I involuntary begin to down it. I involuntarily kiss her. A knock at the door makes her pull away and I mentally thank whoever is interrupting us.

"Jeremy?"

It's Brooke.

"Are you in there?"

Chloe puts a finger to her lips, telling me to stay quiet, and as much as I want to make noise or get up and leave, the squip prevents me from doing so.

"Jenna Rolan said she saw you go upstairs. Jeremy?"

After another moment of knocking, Brooke gives up and leaves. I exhale a breath I didn't know I was holding.

"If Jenna Rolan saw us..." I trail off.

"Jenna Rolan should mind her own business."

"Brooke's going to find out. Don't you care?"

"You're less cute when you're talking."

Help me out here!

Konichiwa!

What?

Alcohol temporarily scrambles my shisutemu.

THEN WHY DID YOU MAKE ME DRINK IT?!

It was important you take advantage of the jōkyō. You'll thank me atode. Ima oki nasai, anata wa baka o shite iru. Jeiku wa koko ni ite, anata wa fukai kuso ni iru.

Chloe speaks up.

"Whatever, I've had enough-"

There's a loud pounding on the door.

"JEREMY HEERE?!"

"Ohh, the fun begins,"

"Is that... Jake?" I ask.

"JEREMY, I KNOW YOU'RE NOT HAVING SEX ON MY PARENTS' BED, BECAUSE IF YOU WERE, I'D HAVE TO RIP YOUR BALLS OFF!"

"GREAT, THEN YOU CAN BOTH BE BALL-LESS!"