Her Selection : A Selection Story

Chapter 26

      "Your home visits looked just as fun as you say, but I of course have one final question on this topic," Dolan says. I nod, keeping my body still so no one can see what emotions I may need to hide. "Did you expect to leave one boy in his home?"

"This Selection has been utterly unpredictable. Narrowing it down to the final four over the past week was one of those moments," I explain. "But I do believe that in the end my heart will belong to the man it should, and I wish nothing but the best for Jesse Rambo."

"And speaking of the end, how will Illea's first born queen end her Selection?"

"As any other Selection has ended, with my choice and acceptance of the future Prince. Don't try to get any hint of who it may be either, because my heart is split four ways. But I'm sure it will be before the new year all our hearts and minds don't have long until my choice is made."

Dolan closes the Report and I retreat to my parents. I had barely had any time since returning to think or sleep. I hadn't been in my room except to bathe and change. There would be a quick dinner for me before I escaped to my room.

It's comforting to see all the boys at once and being able to compare my feelings in this way. I loved each of them so deeply, yet so differently. I needed to know which was strongest, or ultimately, which love and boy I couldn't live without. I had five weeks to decide who was best for me and the country. But did I need that long?

I want to spend a bit of time with the boys, but I'm too tired to do much of anything. I tell everyone goodnight before heading to my room. After changing into my night clothes, I flop on my bed, but the sound of paper beneath me makes me sit up. Even in the dim light, I can make out Flynn's handwriting. My name on the front, so of course I open the envelope.

Selene. Selene. Saying, thinking, even writing your name makes this poor boy smile. I love you so much and I'm glad you enjoyed being with my family. At your birthday I was worried they would remind you where I and from and ruin my chances but I don't worry about that now. I love you for who you are, and I believe you love me for who I am, not who I was.

I know you love each of us, and I and I am not dumb enough to think I have the best chance. But I honestly believe we could be great together. For our country, our people, and ourselves. I miss you so much and it's only been a day. You mean so much to me. I love you. I'm glad you're back. I'm sure I will be.

-Just some thoughts as I sit here missing you

  Love Flynn

When I wake up the following morning, the letter is resting by my side. Sleep hadn't calmed my mind and I may be even more confused now than I was before. The positives and negatives of each choice seemed to equal out. Each boy would be good, but they all had something that needed work.

How had my ancestors done it? How had my father? There was only one way to find out, and this time I had to know everything, not just what was shown on camera.

"Selene, darling, are you feeling okay?" my dad asks as I walk into his office.

"I look bad, I get it. I just woke up," I tell him before glancing at one of the advisers. "Can I speak with my father alone?" the woman nods and leaves us alone. I walk to my dad's desk and stand in front of him.

"What's going on? Did something happen, sweet pea?"

"You continue to talk to me as if I'm your little girl, and I always will be, but I want the whole truth- even the bad parts- because I need help."

"You can't make a decision, can you"

"No! Xander, he is so amazing and I am truly in love with him. He is great with people, and kids, and will be a wonderful dad someday. But does my attraction stem from comfort because he protects me? Owen has made it clear how I am all he cares for, but I'm not sure he can handle the pressure of being in the public's watch constantly. Flynn loves me, I know, he's smart and funny, his family is wonderful, although I have noticed he is easily angered. And Rowan, the more I think of it, I see that my physical attraction may be strongest of anything.