Sinister Ego : Dangerous Minds

19. Death Day

He called our names.

That morning, when we woke up, he called our names.

Rin and I were part of the first group to go into the city. Going with us was Casey and his cell mate, a frail girl with unnaturally pale skin and a small smile. Father said he was bringing all his guards with him, which was only four. That surprised me. It was amazing how much fear Father could induce with only four people.

I half expected father to ask us to carry him on our shoulders while he lazily sat on his thrown, like in the movies. Instead, Father went on his feet, carrying a small switchblade. He wore his usual toga like sheet, and the guards wore their signature blood red uniforms. We were instructed by father to wear our uniforms, that we hadn't even changed out of since we arrived. As a result, me and Rin, along with every member of the cult, absolutely reeked of body odor. It was like living in a zoo. A zoo where all the other animals are pissing and shitting all over you and they don't even realize they're doing it.

We didn't take a vehicle. We just walked straight out of the building. Seeing the sky, seeing the streets, seeing open space beyond the prison I had been trapped in... It was like seeing heaven. It was almost unreal to me, seeing these things that I thought I'd never see again. Even though I was surrounded by Father's guards, I considered this a blessing. Maybe it was slowly getting better. I had thought I'd never again see the sun, and I saw it now. I still thought I'd never again see Rory or my mom or anything I loved, but maybe I would. I wondered how that would feel.

Rory....his car was still in the parking lot. I felt my heart drop down into my stomach. Just seeing it made me think about the life I once had, and how I would do anything to go back to it. But there isn't much I can do.

If it's still there, are they not searching for me? Rory would have told them what car he had, and they would have easily found it. Then they would have looked in the building and found me and Rin and Father and the guards and everybody else. Father and his guards would have been thrown in prison when they found all the torture devices. They'd have been put on death row. Me and Rin and everyone else would be put in a mental hospital. We'd have been put in a mental hospital for a long, long time. But we'd have gotten better, at least most of us. We'd be away from here and with people who wanted to help us, not use and kill us.

Except that won't happen. If it was going to, it would have already.

No one is searching for me. No one is searching for any of us.

Going out into the city, I would have to do something. I'd have to be clever. I'd have to get away. Me and Rin, we'd have to get away.

This may be our only hope.

*********

When we weren't even a block away from the building, Father told us who we needed to kill first.

It was a tall, Hispanic teenage boy with headphones around his neck in a solid black hoodie. On his back was a book bag and he carried an Algebra book in his hands. No doubt, he was on his way to school. Father had stared at him for no longer than five seconds before proclaiming that he was impure and had to go.

He gave us each a switch blade. The others held them in a ready position. Rin and I tucked them away in our pocket.

Casey and the others did little to conceal their excitement. One of them, a short black girl who must have only been about thirteen, was even jumping up and down.

"Let me have this one," she yelled, and without even waiting for an okay, she advanced on the boy, weapon drawn. He promptly snapped his head in her direction. But he only had time to widen his eyes before she pounced on top of him and slit his throat, making him and his book fall to the pavement, his algebra homework drifting to his side.

The others cheered as he gasped for air.

"Well done!" Father exclaimed. "Well done."

The other continued to to talk about how awesome it had been. How great it was to have killed an innocent kid guilty of absolutely nothing but walking to school in the morning. I refused to say a word. I refused to do anything but let the rage slowly grow inside of me.

Until I couldn't stop myself anymore.

I rounded on Father, who was smiling like a sadistic idiot. It made me sick. It struck a nerve so deep inside of me that I didn't even know it existed.

"Yeah," I said, voice smeared in dangerous sarcasm. "This is great. This is fucking amazing. It really fucking is. Who ever knew killing innocent kids could be so damn entertaining?"

From a few feet in front of me, Casey nodded. "You're getting it, Ricky. You're really getting it. I knew you'd come around."

Everyone expect Rin, who just stared straight ahead with a dark expression, cheered. Even father and the guards.

This struck an even deeper nerve.

In one swift movement, I was on top of Casey, with my blade drawn. And, in this moment, it felt okay. In this moment of stress and rage and the maddest anger anyone could ever feel, killing someone felt ok.

It felt like a good idea.

It felt like something I wanted to do.