Forgetting Logic | Book One

9

 

Alexander.

"You need to take your fucking medicine. What if you go and try to do something stupid again?" I pressed.

"I won't."

"You tried to kill yourself four days ago."

"Woopty doo." I knew this all too well and I didn't want to get sucked back in. 

"That's all you have to say?"

"Yeah actually."

"I saved your life dumb fuck."

"Do you want a cookie or something?"

"I want you to stop being a fucking jackass."

I snatched my jacket from the couch and slammed the door closed.

 This is what the fuck I get for trying to be helpful. I knew he would revert back to his old ways. 

 I walked to Starbucks to just clear my mind. Everything just ran through it so fast. I could barely catch a single thought.

I pulled my notebook out of my bag and began to write.

My heart has somehow ended up on the floor like broken glass,

These are pieces from a shattered mirror my bones possessed,

No it's not a curse if you look into it but it might feel like one,

A curse of senseless meaning,

You call it a myth,

Suspicion,

I call it realistic,

Something that no one else feels,

Maybe it was just a harmless crush,

Maybe it wasn't,

Maybe we're all just people trying to figure how this this whole "I love you thing" works,

Maybe we're just scientists experimenting on each others hearts,

Testing their endurance,

The endurance of being broken down by a person that you care for deeply,

Yes I said care for deeply,

Let's not put name tags on things,

Name tags only make us fall faster for someone who's not what they seem,

Cause when they rip that label off we're always stuck saying "who are you",

We worry about people who don't even give us the time of day,

Why would I swim through the Pacific ocean for you,

If you wouldn't even step in a puddle for me,