Legolas One-Shots

Worlds Collide (or: The One About Conditioner)

It was just supposed to be a hunting trip. Maybe a couple of Orcs would show up, or Goblins or something. But other than that, they hadn't prepared for too much off-track excitement.

Legolas was perched in a tree, ready to shoot down a deer he'd been tracking. There was a crackle in the air, and then the sky opened up. Legolas stared. This was not something he'd ever seen before. A huge rip in the sky. He didn't even mind that his deer got away. He kept his eyes on the rip, and was shocked to see two beings fall out of it before it started to repair itself, leaving no trace of a tear.

He started running across the trees, trying to find the beings that had fallen. When he finally found them, he saw that Aragorn had already reached them and was looking over one of them for injuries. The other was standing off to the side, checking out he surroundings.

Legolas jumped down from the tree and looked over the beings - Men, he noticed. Or, one of them was. The one off to the side had something... otherworldly about him. Kind of... electric.

"Aragorn, what is going on?" he asked his companion.

The man did not look up from where he was bandaging the other man's wrist. "I don't know, Legolas. I don't think they do, either."

The unknown man's eyes widened, and he looked like he might've jerked away had Aragorn not been wrapping his wrist.

"Aragorn and Legolas?"

The two looked at him oddly and nodded slightly.

"Well, fuck." He turned to his own companion. "Thor, we're in fucking Middle Earth."

Thor turned, "Are you sure, Stark?"

Stark groaned and nodded, "Yeah. Fuck." He rubbed a hand over his face and Legolas looked him over warily. He didn't quite like the look of the glow in the man's chest. But Stark spoke up again before he could say anything. "Can you just open it again? Or... or do you have a way to contact the team?"

Thor walked over, "I'm sorry, I cannot. We may have to wait until they find us."

Stark groaned again, and Legolas was about ready to just tell him to stop being obnoxious. But Thor turned to him.

"I'm sorry, my friend, but I must ask about your hair."

Legolas blinked. Well, this had taken an odd turn. Though not unpleasant. He took notice of Thor's own long hair. "What about it?"

"You must keep it so well. Even that of the women in my own home is not so soft. You must tell me: Which shampoo? Any conditioner? Or perhaps a special oil?"

Legolas scoffed lightly, but gently preened his hair. "Of course I use special conditioner. You can't think I keep it so silky without help?"

The two blondes started talking about the products they used, and Legolas promised to get Thor a vial of the special conditioner he used. Stark and Aragorn just looked at each other and then back at the two.

"You have got to be kidding me."