Love and loss short stories.

Im really sorry about this but i needed to type it...

This is more for me than you and it probably won't make any sense but here is the only place I can say it...

Thinking that you are never good enough for the person you love is one of the worst feelings in the world. You think you can't be happy because you aren't perfect so you believe that you aren't good enough. With nobody to tell you that you are how are you ever going to reach for the love that you so desperately seek and need. People believe that you need to love yourself to love somebody else however I feel my heart react to your very being whilst i avoid the mirrors and cameras so I don't have to see myself. If I have to love myself before loving you how comes you're the only thing that can stop me from hating myself, I love you so much I would do anything in my power to make you happy, I couldn't care less about myself as you are my everything. The ramblings of a mad little girl who's typing fingers cannot keep up with her thoughts or heart creates a small understanding of how jumbled everything is inside however it also leaves you more confused than ever. Inspiration comes from many different places, a song, a picture, a kiss... mine came from you, everything you do makes me want to know more, the thought of you leaves me thinking of a momentary of happiness that I don't think I will ever be able to realistically grasp because I have the idea of being perfect however it's the one thing I can't truly understand or achieve. In my opinion you deserve so much more than what this world can give you, than what I could ever give you but still I want to try. You probably think differently but it's the truth. Confessing is seriously scary, I can never really tell you how I feel no just because of the thought of inevitable rejection but also my insecurities, the way I look, dress, act, think all make me believe that you will forever regret it even if you say yes. Being hurt so many times doesn't make you stronger it makes you vulnerable, you flinch at the thought of being hurt and unwanted so you never put yourself out there but that is exactly what I'm doing because I have been hurt more times than I can really count and just because people can't see my pain and tell me how strong I am doesn't mean I'm not a mess inside. The feeling of being unwanted gnaws at me everyday, I'm too fat, too ugly, too annoying and too loud for anyone to love. You think I'm confident but the truth is that I have a mask that I need to hide all of my insecurities from being unloved for so long. You're one of the good ones, so good that I could never deserve someone like you, someone so amazing and light I could never reach you. Truth is I'm scared, I'm petrified! Telling you how I feel? I couldn't think of anything worse because to be unwanted by someone who is so amazing and by the one person that has made me feel hope that I could fall for one of the good ones will break me. And let me tell you picking up the pieces alone is never fun because you only then truly see how much your broken. Sometimes you just don't want to put yourself together again and end up wishing that you weren't so broken or that there was somebody to help pick up the pieces and that's the worst part. The feeling your going to cry but forcing your mask up and pretending to smile because nobody cares enough, nobody cares at all.