Pure At Heart (12) Reactions and Regrets

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"How can I believe you? How do I believe you're telling the truth when you lied to me about your whole life?" he said, looking straight into my eyes. I stared at him, holding back my tears.

"You have commited major sins Hamna. I dont know if I can ever love you the same way again. I can't forgive you.. I just cant", he said and walked out the room, leaving me in between the silent walls of the bedroom. I commited major sins but who is he to not forgive me? I am not asking for his forgiveness, I am asking for Allah's forgiveness. It doesn't affect me in any way that he is not forgiving me. If my Allah has already forgiven me, what else do I need? I let out a deep breathe and took out my clothes for the party. Even though I was in no mood to laugh or talk, I still decided to go and enjoy the dinner. I got ready and went and sat down in the living room, waiting for everybody else to get ready.

In the car, Zayd didn't say anything and neither did I. We sat still as he drove to his aunt's house.

"You dont need to show your strange behavior to anybody over there. I dont want anybody thinking there's something going on between us", he said when he parked the car.

"Why? Are you scared?" I said and got out the car. He quickly got off as well and stared at me over his car's roof.

"Your attitude isn't working", he said in a cold tone. "Yours isn't either", I fought back. He was about to say something when his family's car's headlights shone on us and he stopped. They parked right behind Zayd's car and we all went in together.

At the party, Zayd avoided me as much as he could. He didn't talk to me or even look at me the entire time. He told me to act normal but he, himself was making it so obvious.

"So where are you guys going to go for the honeymoon?" His aunt asked as we all sat down together for the dessert. I looked at her. "Honeymoon?" I said as I felt Zayd's gaze on me

"Yeah. Tell us! Its been more than two months, when are you guys going to go?" Zayd's sister Zaynah asked with a gentle smile. Next to her, Dylan and Maryan sat with their faces pale. I guess they really couldn't stand whenever someone said anything about me having fun.

"Where are you two going to go?" Zayd's aunt asked again. My gaze hovered over to Zayd and he looked away. I just smiled and started eating my chocolate ice cream. What do i answer to that? We might never go to a honeymoon. We could barely even keep the relationship stable. Everybody gave each other a smile and I caught Zayd looking at me. I looked down. The awkwardness was far too awkward to handle.

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"Im dropping you off at your parent's house", Zayd said as he pulled over on my parent's driveway. I looked at him. "You think I dont see that?" I said and got off the car. I was about to press the intercom when I heard his voice. "You know your attitude doesn't make any sense? Not even a little bit", he said. I turned around. "How many times are you going to say that?" I said as I pressed the intercom button.

I heard a loud bang of him closing the car door. He drove away even before I could enter the house. His car faded away in the dim street lights as he made a turn around the corner. I had no idea if  I would ever see him again. I might never see him again.

About a minute or two later, I pressed the intercom again. It was 11:00pm and they might be sleeping. After pressing it for the fourth time and not getting any answer, I knocked on the door a little louder than usual. I heard the door open with a click and in front of me stood Hafsa, rubbing her eyes. I gulped and smiled uncomfortably as her face expressions turned from calm to shocked. She looked behind me to see if Zayd was there too, but when she saw me standing alone, she asked quickly. "What happened?"

"Can I come in first? I'll tell you everything", I said and she nodded, making way for me to go inside. She locked the door and turned on the lamp that was hanging on top of the dining table. "Mami and Baba are sleeping right?" I asked her as I sat down on one of the chairs. She nodded.

"What happened?" She asked again. "Well...", I sighed. "Dylan happened."

"He did something again?" She asked and I nodded. "He told Zayd that I was his fiancé. And Zayd wouldn't believe the real story I told him", I could barely keep the tears from falling. "He dropped me here. I think he might never come back", I finished.

Hafsa sighed. She pushed her hair back as her other hand stroked mine. "Don't worry. Everything will be ok. I'll talk to Zayd", She offered.

I shook my head. "No.. you won't. Nobody will. We don't need to explain anything because we're telling the truth. We don't need to show him any proof to show we're not guilty", I spoke with a firm voice. "And please don't tell Mami and Baba either. I don't want them getting worried because of me", I said. She looked at me. "What are you going to tell them in the morning?" She asked me.

"Just tell them I came to spend the week with you guys. I can't tell them right away", I said. She nodded. "Let's go to sleep right now. We'll do all of this in the morning", She said, walking towards the bedroom. I didn't have any clothes to wear for the night so I wore Hafsa's. It was a bit hard for me to sleep since I had no idea I would be sleeping in my old room tonight. I kept changing positions, but it didn't help me a little in sleeping. I sat up because I could feel like I was going to throw up any second. My whole room was spinning in front of me and I felt my head getting heavy. I ran to the bathroom and after a few gags, I came out, resting my hand on the wall for support. What was going on? It had been a week since this had been happening. Why was I so sick all of a sudden?

I sat down on the bed but I couldn't lie down. I felt like I needed to see a doctor right at the moment but of course, I couldn't disturb anybody.

"I AM PURE AT HEART!" I shouted to myself as I remembered what Zayd had said earlier. I didn't mean to be bad; it just happened. I was not bad, I was good. I buried my face in my hands and started crying. I cried the whole night. And I prayed fajr with the same red eyes. I just couldn't sleep. Sleep will not change the situation I currently was in. Nothing would.

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Howdy ya'll! Early update and short chapter - You're welcome and Im sorry (LOL)

I hope you liked the chapter - :)

VOTE , COMMENT AND ADD THIS TO YOUR READING LIST, OKAY? lol

Dedicated to @Iqra786 for having the nerve to catch up on the story in a day or two. lol. THANKYOU. I LOVE YOU. <3

Salams,

BritishHolic. 

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