He's what I need

Where it all began - Chapter one

It's been so long.

I can't remember who I am meant to be anymore.

Am I the nerdy girl.

Am I lost.

Am I the bitch they say I am.

What happened to me.

When did I change.

"watch it, jade" someone snarls at me, pulling me from my depressed thoughts. I look to my left to see who it was that snarled, but before I could thing about it my hand was round his neck, pushing him against the wall.

"Who do you think you are" I snap at Ricky, I scrunch my face up, remove my hand from him and let him fall to the floor. He's staring at me, like really starting try to assess me, he is not fazed by what I've just done. I can feel the sting burning in my eyes as the tears start to brim. I watch his facial expression change, more to a softer look, fellow class mates who are in the corridor have gone quiet.

I look around to see why. Everyone is staring at me, at us, at the commotion I just caused. Scrutinizing me. A tear falls from the corner of my eye, I fight natural instinct to wipe it away. I don't want to appear like I am weak. I'm still looking at Ricky, trying to muster up the words to apologise to him. The whispering begins, it quiet, I hear everyone move out the way for some. I still don't look.

Ricky jumps to his feet quickly, I'm still staring at him, trying to figure out where we are in this thing we've got going on but he isn't staring at me anymore, I know there is someone behind me, I don't look or try not to look. Not because I'm scared. scratch that I'm afraid of who it is.

"What have you done" he bellows loudly so everyone can hear but there's a slight humour to his sweet voice, I don't look at him, wishing he wasn't talking to me, I've only ever seen him three times in our school life's, not because I don't want to but because he never around and if he is, he has landed himself up in detention but God he is this boy hot.

"I, I didn't me, me mean too" Ricky stutters, running his hand through his blonde hair. He's normally confidant in these situations, way to confidant I think to myself. I take the chance to look around, they're all scared of him, what has he ever done to them, to make them fear him. I like Ricky me and him go way back and by that I mean since we were babies, since we couldn't talk and our mothers thought it was a good idea to have us share a life but there comes a time when people change and we both did, me more so then him. My anger is rising at this fool,

I ram my finger into this being's chest "don't talk to him like that, you don't have the right" I snap the last part to make my point clear, this lob sided smirk appears across his gorgeous face, and his green eyes spark with amusement, he's enjoying this. We're at a standoff, him smirking and me being angry, really angry "I'm Grey, it's a pleasure to finally meet the girl. Whose temper is nearly as bad as mine" he states cockily extending his right hand to me, the cheek.

I look down at his hand in disgust before I turn around quickly, grab Ricky's left hand and pull him away "come on Rick, we do not have to associate ourselves with someone who has no morals" I walk away with Ricky like a boss.

Once we are round the corner away from prying eyes, Ricky wrenches his hand from mine "we aren't friends anymore jade, you do not need to protect me, hell you don't even talk to me, what made this different?" He's rounding on me just like he use to do, I can't take this not from anyone especially not from him, I look into his ocean eyes, to see the hurt, I'm alone and that's all that matters now. I don't give him the satisfaction of a reply before I turn and walk away from him.

*************

I push the door open to my house, letting it slam into the wall, the noise echoes through the corridor before is disappears as quickly as it starts. I take a deep breath in and step over the fresh hold "it's just me dad, I'm home, I've been extremely good in school today" I shout out to make my presence known, I grab the door and slam it shut letting the hallways fill with sound once again "I met the resident bad boy today" I continue on hoping for a response, but there is nothing, there never is "okay dad, I'm going to change and go for a walk" still shouting. I know he can hear me; he always does but he never answers.

What the hell have I ever done to him. I think to myself as I walk into the kitchen. I place my bag on the breakfast bar, I look round the room, and sigh. This room use to be so full of life but now it's bare like no one lives here. I grab my hoodie from the floor where I left it this morning. He hasn't been down otherwise it would have been folded neatly on the counter top. I pull the old hoodie over my head as I walk back through the house to the mirror by the front door.

I look at my reflection, when did my hair become dull? when did I become so thin? when did I start to look tired I thought, I run my hand down my face hoping to bring colour back to my skin and my blue eyes. It didn't work. I let out another sigh before I turn to the door and head out for that walk.

I'm standing outside Ricky's house, it's one of those big houses, you know the ones where the rich live but not really rich. should I just go knock, I fight with myself over this before I turn around and walk back the way I came. He doesn't want to see me any way my thoughts snap at me; I turn left at the end of his street instead of right which leads back to my house. I walk for another fifteen minutes before I stop outside a little home with a white picket fence. I stand looking at the perfectly painted yellow home, is Lana home, what is she doing, should I knock, would she be happy to see me, will she answer. I shake my head to get the hope out my head. This is a bad Idea. I walk away once again without trying.

I find myself at the park two blocks from my house. I walk across the playing field. Pass a group of lads playing football in a ruff manner. I sit down at a bench by the pond, it's beautiful here, it's my favourite place, has been since the day my mum brought me here at the age of four with Ricky and Lana. I smile at the memory. I close my eyes to submerge myself in my own thoughts. I don't know how long I was sitting there before I felt someone tapping my shoulder, I keep my eyes shut but they continue to tap my shoulder. It's annoying, I snap my eyes open and turn my head to the left to see who it is that's bothering me, I mentally groan to myself, "Jade, right?" he asks, what the hell, first at school and now here, can't he just leave me alone.

"I just want to be left alone, clearly that isn't going to happen" I snap at Grey, he chuckles deeply

"You we're deep in thought, I called you about five times before I came over" I looked at him shocked

"I must of been well gone, sorry" I say a little embarrassed,

"It's okay, I just wanted to know if you wanted to hang with me and the guys" he asks pointing to the guys, who clearly have stopped playing ball, I don't know what to say to him, he's the bad boy and well I haven't had any real friends for a long while

"Come on it'll be fun" he hints with a smirk, he grabs my hand and pulling me from my seat, this guy is very touchy feely. he leads me over to his friends, all the while I'm resisting, trying to make this harder than needs be.

"Guys this is Jade" he points to me "and Jade this is, Ryan, Carter, Levi, Harry and Jax" he points to each guy while saying their names hoping that I caught what he was saying, these guys are just like Greek gods, where have they been hiding I thought while smiling to myself.

Once he had introduced us, we just sat in a circle all evening talking, well they talked, I listened and God did a listen, their voices are just as sexy as Greys, they talked for hours about everything before, I told them I had to go and headed home.