Feel The Angst

book review

This is a book written by @Ramenthesoup

Ok ive read the intro and here's some things i need to say(im reviewing the book/story/characters)

1) In overall, the book lacks in dept description. Everything is decribed briefly with not much detail. i suggest you work on the details and when i say details i mean things like the characters relationship with ecah other and their reactions to certain events. Yes, mention this when writing about the side characters as well. Being descriptive when writing helps readers to imagine your story better! This description is short but I'll go more in dept later on in this review when i pick out certain notable parts.

2)

The first thing that came to me was how sunny "flew open the door" i get the meaning you were tryna convey but GRAMMATICAL ERROR! (im super ocd about grammar fyi) instead of flew open i think it should be " practically flew through the open door" (i sound overbearing i know but thats the point of a review right?) Next, was the way sunny called ramen an idiot. If sunny was the employee,speaking to your boss in such a manner is sure way to get fired...also,the last part, sunny talks as if ramen knew about the murder case in the first place and is there to remind her to work on it, if thats the case then ramen is a pretty horrible detective. She doesnt even remember her own case....just saying

3)

I think you meant "if kicking open the door, was the normal way of going in then they were definately normal" (i just can't help rephrasing things sorry)

4)

After reading this i conclude, sunny SUCKS as a detective. Bro, if you see someone don't alert the person by yelling "THERE'S SOMEONE OUT THERE!" just guesture/whisper to your team mates or something but DONT scream it Omggg(the guy will know you're there and make his escape) Also, she jumped out the window. What even?? Use a door dude, doesnt that window have broken glass or something? As old as the house may be, the window will never be complete clean and free from debris. All im saying about the window thing is that its pretty unrealistic

4)

Hiroshi caught him without struggle?? Really -_-. maybe a description on the guy being chased's reaction and the struggle when hiroshi dealt with when the guy was being caught would be appreciated.( i mean, if you're a bad guy and got caught you would struggle to get free right?) If not, Hiroshi might seem like a garystu if he caught the guy in a flash.

In conclusion, more detail would definitely be appreciated and it also will help the reader enjoy the story better if they can imagine the scenes going on in the book (like i said before)  also, just wondering are the mistakes in here meant to be there on purpose because you tagged it as a humor book? (That was a legit qn, not an insult)

Random fact about me: i find smirking a huge turn on (but honestly it depends on the guy as well) hue. Byeeee