I have a fault in my personality. You see, I thrive off of other people's well being. As long as the person I care about is happy, I'm happy. As long as they are healthy, I am happy. When people I care about are hurting, I feel like they are hurting me more than they are hurting themselves.
When a person I depend on shows me that they don't need me as much as I need them, I'm crushed. I feel light, like I'm floating, and I can feel my body being moved by waves. It's weird, but that's what it feels like.
It's a terrible feeling, knowing you aren't needed. My body does this little defense thing and I end up burying my hurt to appear as apathetic as they are. Then I end up crying. Nice feelings I have.
I really have no-one to talk to. I used to have two people, but we are kinda growing apart it think. I don't want to talk to anyone else. Good job, Izb. You have two perfectly good people but you can't keep them. 👏
I'm not saying that they are the ones leaving, it's quite the opposite. I pushed them away. Perhaps it's best we don't talk any more. Maybe I'm better off on my own.
I just don't like feeling so alone.
