WHERE IT BEGAN (TRUE STORY)

Where it all began

(Please feel free to use the song I have linked down below, gives the effect of the story an intensity)

My names Gemmah Rose, and this is my story, this is where it all began.

I have a little sister, and two little brothers, an older sister and an older brother they are my world, to be honest it feels as if I was the parent sometimes, taking care of my younger siblings, my parents were never there for them when they needed there help, my mum tried but dad pushed her to work so he didn't have to as much.

I was a year into my high school years. I was bullied constantly, whether it was from wearing to much makeup, or down to being to smart. It didn't make it any better going home to a house full of hatred, my parents were constantly arguing, swearing and yelling at each other. I was so fed up on being bullied and just being in so much pain from my families drama. I started to cut myself, I thought it was the only way to put an end to all of the pain the bullies were causing me.

I was 13 years old, I was in love.. my first love, Josh. who would have thought that there was such thing at this age, my parents definitely didn't. They thought I was insane, there was no way I could possibly be 'in love' I was to young. But I didn't care what anyone thought, I loved him. We would spend every second we could together, we were inseparable.

A couple of months had went by. I was so deeply in love. One night, like every teenage did. I told my parents I was staying at a friends who lived in his town when I was really staying at his house with my friend to go to a party, I got absolutely legless. I obviously was not able to handle my drink back then. I was a wreck, I didn't know where I was or what to do. Luckily my friend was there for me, to take care of me. So after I sobered up a bit we all went back to my boyfriends house, where I had sex with him at the age of 13, I am not going to deny it, at all. I wanted it and I wanted it badly, I know it isn't the best thing to be coming out of a 13 year olds mouth.
But I matured very young, I had gotten my periods at a young age, at the age of 10 to be exact, I experienced everything at such a young age, my parents hadn't even talked to me about periods at this age, to be honest I thought I was dying when I first got them.

Josh and I stayed together for 12 months before I had shut him out, because I fell pregnant with his child which I never told him about till a month after I had found out, even though we always used protection it still happened, we had sex nearly every time we were together it was bound to happen, just a matter of when. I didn't know what to do, I was 14 by this time and freaking out. (Never have sex until you are ready to take care of a child) I started to cut myself again, I was so depressed, I had never felt so alone, I had no one to talk to, I had nothing left. I started to show a little bit and I was to scared to go to school incase someone would recognise me getting bigger so quickly.

I ended up deciding to tell josh 2 months into the pregnancy I was scared and I had to tell someone, I didn't want to do this alone. So one day at school I pulled him aside from all of his friends, and sat him down somewhere where no one could here, I told him about the pregnancy and asked about what we should do, he immediately said 'have an abortion I'll pay for it, we are way to young'. I knew this was the right thing, but this would mean I would have to tell my parents, they had no idea I wasn't a Virgin anymore either! I was so scared of how my dad was going to react.. as josh and I kept talking he grabbed my hands and kissed my forehead he said 'is this why you have been shutting me out?' I replied with 'yes josh, I was scared, I didn't know what to do' I started to cry in his arms.. all of our friends would not stop staring at us. He felt something strange on my wrists, he quickly turned them over and saw my deep cuts. He immediately pushed me off him, and started yelling at me! Telling me 'WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?!' I didn't know what to say.. I was so scared.. everyone was looking at us, I started crying. He stormed off and that was the last time I had talked to josh in a couple of years, I seen him around school but that was it.