Love is a fire. Whether it is going to burn you down or warm your heart, you'll never tell. Sometimes I wish it would warm your heart instead of leaving deadly burns on it, but unfortunately you can't choose what other people do. I realized this as my vision blurred around me. I couldn't believe it. He just walked out of the room. He didn't say anything. He didn't look at me. He just...left. Maybe he just needed some air. He'll be back. I know he will. A glass of water is probably the cause of his sudden leave. Sometimes I get extremely thirsty at random times also. Yes. That must be it.
As soon as I heard the front door slam shut, I knew I was wrong. He wasn't getting a glass of water, unless he didn't like the water in the apartment and he had to go someplace else to get the water. That's probably what it was. I'm sure of it. I stood there, debating whether he was getting water or not for no more than five minutes before Jared walked in. I didn't want to look into his eyes. I knew he felt sorry for me. Of course, I don't know why he would. Devon was just going to get a glass of water. Hopefully.
"Is there anything I can do for you, Scar? Do you need a fluffy pillow, a glass of water...?"
"Please, just agarra mi mano. Por favor." He understood my mixed sentence and intertwined our fingers.
"What are you going to do?" He asked after a moment of silence.
I shrugged. "What choice do I have? I'm going to raise this child, with or without him."
"But what about Julliard?"
I grimaced. I didn't want to think about that right now. "I wouldn't have gotten into there anyways."
"Scar-"
"What? I'm old enough to take care of the baby. I made the choice to live the life I did, and now I have to face the consequences."
"I'll help you."
"No."
"But-"
"No buts! You have Violet. She loves you, she's your girlfriend." I reminded him.
"And you're my fiancée."
I sighed. "That doesn't mean anything! Once our parents find out about the baby, they're going to break it off for sure. They wouldn't want to burden you with a child that isn't even yours. I wouldn't let them even if they don't break it off. I'll run away with Devon when he gets back."
He shook his head. "I don't think so, I don't think our parents have a choice in this arranged marriage thing."
"That doesn't even make any sense. Who would want to see us together? Who would want to ruin our lives like that? I doubt anybody could have that much power over our parents even if they did want to ruin us." I pointed out.
"I'm just saying..."
"Well stop. I know you want to help, you always do, but I won't let you this time. This isn't your burden to carry." He started to speak but I
interrupted him again. "I'm going for a walk. Don't wait up. Quit trying to help me. I... I just can't handle it, okay?"
I quickly grabbed my purse and made my way out of the apartment building. I wished I wouldn't have finished the way I had. I didn't know what he was thinking about it all, but I hoped he didn't catch my feelings behind my words. He hurt me deeply before, and although I acted as though I didn't care and that he didn't hurt me in the least, I wouldn't let myself be that vulnerable again. And letting him help me with this baby would definitely be leaving me vulnerable. No matter how much I could deny it, I would always love him. He was the guy who saved me from myself. He was also the guy who broke me. Devon was the one who saved me from the pain that Jared had caused me. If Devon never came back, who would help me then?
