The Company of Myself.

The Company of Myself - Chapter 17

"Just... forget about it."

"Jonah. I can't. What if she's in love with me, and I can't return her feelings again? What if I hurt her again? I can't do that. She's too... fragile."

"Well, does it really matter if she does or not?!" I threw Jonah an agitated look and made my way down the stairs, listening as he followed down with me.

"You're not with her. She's a friend. I know it's normal to be worried about rejecting someone, but if you don't, then it'll just turn out worse!" I groaned and grabbed my beige coat, throwing it on, and buttoning the military style buttons. Jonah sighed, rubbing his temples.

"Besides. You don't even know if the girl actually likes you. You even said you probably imagined it! You don't know anything yet, Quinn. Just stop assuming, and live you life!"

"But we haven't talked since then. I feel like I did something wrong."

After what seemed like the longest week ever, I was finally attending Katie Fitche's end of the year blow out party. Lydia's sister had rented out the house, so they had to resort to Katie's house. I had already made plans to meet up with the gang and Pandora, and the only thing left to do was to get to the house. But that night, concerned me. It was the first night I was going public with Pandora, and the first night I'd see Emily since our last afternoon at the diner. I was afraid that mixing those two things together would end up in disaster.

"Look, you don't even have to go. It's just one party." I headed to the door, grabbing my leather messenger bag and looking into the hallway mirror before looking to the door.

"I already made plans. And I think Katie's giving out some love drugs and buds." Jonah frowned at me, and sighed slowly.

"Don't go crazy, alright, Junior? Just bring me back some booze, and we'll be even."

"Alright, Alcoholic." I laughed, while exiting.

Again, like the walk back in October, I thought about what had happened in the past week, and what was to happen in the coming weeks. I thought about Emily, and Pandora for the most part, though. According to Pandora, Emily was now meeting up with a guy at an old library weekly. Supposedly, a college student who was an planning on becoming a musician, a bit like Lix. He looked like a cross between Jas and Jamie Dornan. The perfect guy.

But that didn't matter. Or least, I thought so. I was completely happy with Pandora. In a handful of days, we'd be together for a month. A milestone, taken that so many things got in our way before getting together. And we were happy. Of course we were. For once in my life, since my break up with Emily, I could say I was happy, and truly mean it.

***

"There you are! What took you so long?" Astrid and Lucie swung arms around me, and giggled as Jas and Lix crowded over them. "Your girl's been waiting on you." They broke apart, and let Pandora in. She wore a large sweater that day. It was painted in a way that resembled the British flag, and it look over sized on her. I smiled as I set my eyes on her, and my heart immediately quickened. She waltzed into my arms, kissing my softly on the lips as soon as she met my arms.

"UGHHH. You know Quinn, for a guy who used to complain about relationships a lot, you do get a lot of action from her, don't you?" Lix laughed, setting a hand on my shoulder. I shrugged it off and grinned, grabbing a bottle of beer from a nearby table. We all sat down, propping our feet onto the low table. Like usual, Katie's backyard was a bit empty, and most of the party reside inside.

"Where's Emily?" I asked, placing an arm around Pandora's shoulder. She leaned her head against my shoulder and intertwined our fingers. She took a sip from my bottle and took out her tin.