Princess of the Rogues

This is my Life

Chapter 18

                I don’t know how long I remained there in the bed. I remained still and unmoving as I took in yet just another set of circumstances that were clouding my mind. I had seen the Moon Goddess and my mum. They had told me about my destiny. They told me I would need to kill my father. They said if anyone was to do it, it would be me.

                My heart felt heavy. I was going to have to kill someone purposefully. My own flesh and blood. Yet, it wasn’t the fact it was my father that made me feel sick. It was the thought of purposefully killing someone that had done it. I hated killing. I really hated killing people. I only did it if it was absolutely and undeniably necessary. Sadly, for my father this was a more than necessary death that needed to happen.

                I was going to kill my father if it was the last thing I would do. I would stop him from causing anymore suffering. His endless rage had to end. No more packs would suffer at his hands. If I died trying to do the right thing, then at least I would have an honourable death. I least I would have tried. My father needed to be stopped and now as the time.

                I never wanted to admit having to kill him. I guess it was the sick part of me that saw him as my family. My flesh and blood. He was the person with all the information about my mum. The one connection to her. I had always wanted to try and find out her pack. Maybe try and find some relatives. He was never someone I could call him my dad but he was my family. He had the last connections to my mum.

                Now… I didn’t care. I had a job to be done. I needed to succeed for the vengeance of every pack that had fallen to his hands, for all those families torn apart and the lives that were lost all because of his sick hatred. I was going to finish it. I had never felt more determined than I did at this very moment.

                Would I tell Xander about my meeting? No. He didn’t need to know. He wouldn’t let me face my father. He wouldn’t let me face him and risk my own life. No matter how much I tried to persuade him there was not a single chance of me getting Xander to agree in letting me fight my father to the death. Especially not after today and all of the recent happenings.

                I moved then sitting myself up. I had finally calmed myself down. I was no longer the frozen mess I was earlier. I suddenly had a new focus. Something that would keep me going. I had a brand new determination that I had never felt before. I rubbed my eyes still feeling exhausted because I hadn’t really gained any sleep from this escapade.

                “Jen?” I heard Xander question, with worry laced within his voice.

                “I’m fine. I am sorry about that Xander. Just the fright and terror consumed me. I froze. I am sorry. I shouldn’t have put you or your pack through that especially with the official announcement of war,” I replied, stretching out.

                I stood up from the bed with only the slight hint of numbness remaining in what was my injured side. I was finally healed. That was perfect. I could get straight into training them all. This is exactly what I needed to happen. I needed to stay busy and this was the first step there. I realised I was now in a pyjama top and bottoms which was a change from the dress. I felt so embarrassed at having Xander change me.