Safety (A Harry Styles Love Story) [ON HOLD]

13. Now

hello everyone :) sooooo here's the next update! i hope you guys like it <3 ENJOY <3

            I pressed my ear to the wood of my bathroom door after a while of sitting in the empty bathtub. I heard the TV on in my living room and I slowly unlocked the bathroom door and stepped into my bedroom. I walked into the living room. Harry was sitting on the couch, watching TV.

            “Hi,” I said timidly.

            Harry patted the couch next to him. I sat down but kept a foot and a half of space in between us. He shook his head and pulled me closer to him. “Baby, I’m so, so, so sorry,” he started, shaking his head. “I’m sorry I stayed out so late. I got lost and I decided to crash in my car on the side of the road before I started to come back home. I should have called. Babe, I’m so sorry…” He kissed my lips and moved around my face. “I love you so much.”

            My breathing became a bit shaky and he pulled me into his lap, locking his arms around my waist. I felt my stomach tying up into knots.

            “I don’t mean what I said. I don’t mean a word of it. It’s been so weird being home again. I know I’ve been a shitty fiancé lately and I’m really trying to apologize for everything I might’ve said that made you upset. I love you Jem, I always have and I always will.”

            “It’s okay,” I whispered, putting my hand on his cheek. “It’s a lot to get used to, I understand. I know what and what not to talk about with you now.”

            “Let me kiss you,” Harry whispered, muting the TV in front of us. I smiled as he turned me around to straddle him.

            Time didn’t matter for the next couple minutes. Harry seemed to be back to normal – for now. His swollen lips trailed kisses down my jawbone and to my sweet spot underneath my ear. He chuckled as I let out a low moan.

            “I remember this,” he mumbled on my now sore skin. “I used to drive you crazy…” I giggled and shied away, softly kissing him again. After a little while I moved off of his lap and sat back down next to him, tucking my legs under my body. Harry rested his legs on the coffee table and kept his arm around my shoulders.

            “Let’s see what’s on TV,” I said, taking the remote and turning the TV off of mute. I flipped randomly through the channels stopping briefly on each one to see what the show or movie was called. When I stopped on one channel, gunshots echoed out of the speakers of the TV.

            For the first time since I met Harry, I saw him start sobbing. I quickly changed the channel and turned the TV off. I tried to calm him down but it took a couple minutes. I said his name over and over again, trying to bring him back down to earth with me.

            “You’re okay, you’re okay,” I said over and over again.

            “They’re back!” Harry sobbed, trying to wipe his face. “Don’t let them get me!”

            “No, no Harry, you’re safe,” I cooed, trying to turn him to face me. I used my sleeves to wipe his cheeks and I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck. He buried his nose into the crook of my neck and I held him like that for a while.

            I had never seen him so emotionally unstable. He’d softly cried in front of me before, maybe during a movie or something but he never full on sobbed in front of me before. I ran my hands through his curls the way that I knew he loved. Ever since we first started dating, Harry loved when I played with his hair, whether it being while we were kissing or not.

“You’re okay…” I said over and over again. I kissed his cheek a couple times. “You’re home…”

            I made dinner that night and Harry sat quietly at the island. I tried talking to him but he seemed too lost in his thoughts to reply to me at all. He stared at his wine glass, probably blocking my voice out in his head. I finally stopped talking and continued cooking for the two of us.

            “I don’t know what I would do without you,” Harry said suddenly. I looked over at him as I stood at the stove and stirred the rice on the stove. He abruptly stood up and walked over to me. He stood in front of me, our faces inches apart. I looked up at him, waiting for his next move. His arms slowly wrapped around my waist and he hugged me tight. “I love you so much,” he whispered into the side of my neck. “I love you, Jemma…”

            “I love you too, Harry,” I told him as I wrapped my arms around his neck. He didn’t pull back from the hug.

            “I’m sorry for my impulsive behavior,” he nearly whimpered. I could feel his breath hitting my neck with each word he spoke.

            “I understand,” I whispered, rubbing his back.

            “Jem,” Harry pulled back and looked at him. His eyes were wet and I gently rubbed his cheeks. “Don’t let me be alone anymore.”

            I shook my head. “I won’t, I promise.”

            “You keep me safe, Jem. I need you,” Harry whispered as I ran my hands through his hair. I didn’t ask what I was keeping him safe from, so I just weakly smiled up at my fiancé. “I need you,” he whispered so softly I wasn’t sure if I actually heard him.

            “I’ll keep you safe,” I promised. I held my pinky out and a small smile spread across Harry’s face. His dimple appeared and he wrapped his much larger pinky around mine. “Always.”

            I closed my eyes and smiled when I felt his lips on mine.

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