one direction imagines

sad imagine

warning may cause you to cry if you have a heart

You’re lying in your hospital bed, the sheets cold and stiff against you. It’s just you in the room, the only sound coming from the machine monitoring your heart rate. Suddenly, you hear soft footsteps treading through the corridor leading to your room. Seconds later, Niall is standing at the doorway, his hand placed hesitantly on the frame.

“You awake?” he whispers, entering the room silently. You see in his eyes that he’s tired and worried.

You try sitting up, but the pain is too much. You slide back, getting into a comfortable position where the pain doesn’t feel as bad. “Yeah, of course. I couldn’t miss the chance of talking to you…” you trail off, your voice sounding weak and fragile.

“Come on, don’t waste your energy.” He says, sitting on the end of your bed.

“You’re worth it. Now come on, up here!” you manage to get out, moving over lightly and patting the space next to you, inviting Niall to get comfortable.

He smiles and crawls up to where your hand is now resting, and gets underneath the uncomfortable sheets with you. He kisses your head, where your hair is starting to grow back. “I missed you so so much.” He breathes, giving you goosebumps down your back.

“I missed you too.” You reply as he wraps his arms around you.  You both lay there, Niall’s breath softly hitting your neck; the only sounds are the beeps of the machines and your hearts, beating together as one.

“So, how are the boys?” you ask, breaking the silence, wanting to talk as much as you can with your boyfriend.

“I don’t want to talk about them, I want to talk about you, okay?” he says to you, kissing your cheek. “How are you?”

“How do you think?” you counter his question weakly, but immediately regretting it after you see his expression change from happiness to despair in less than a second. “Sorry, I’m not having the best day.” You cough. “Better now, though. How are you?”

You feel him smile against your cheek. “I’m good, wasn’t sure if I’d make it though.”                    

“Well I’m glad you did.” You whisper, closing your eyes.

A few minutes go past, when Niall breaks the silence. “What do you want to do?” he questions. You can hear the sadness in his voice.

“I’m fin just lying here, unless you want to do anything?” you shrug. After all, it’s late and you’re really tired.

“Nah I’m fine.” He answers, and you can tell he’s tired, too. You both lay there for a little while, until you notice that Niall has drifted off to sleep.

“Niall?” you whisper, making sure that he really is asleep. When he doesn’t reply, you allow yourself to think about what’s happening. “The cancer is winning” you say to yourself softly. Silent tears start to roll down your cheeks slowly as you remember all of your time spent with Niall.

You remember walking down that busy street on your first visit to London. Someone bumping into you, making you fall to the ground. Looking into his blue eyes for the first time and losing the ability to breathe.

You remember your first date at that cute little café on the corner, where you refused to drink the coffee and he laughed at you.

How his warm lips felt sweet against yours the first time he kissed you, out in the rain.

The first time you said “I love you” to each other.

The time he surprised you by flying to your home town in the middle of the tour. Him later taking you to be on tour with him.

Then you remember sitting in that doctor’s office, Niall clenching one hand and your mother holding the other. The doctor telling you that you have cancer, and there was a 50% chance that you were going to make it. Crying with Niall and the rest of the boys over the phone.

Designing your matching barcode tattoos with the date of your anniversary on them as you and Niall sat together in your hospital room one day. Him holding your hand while you got yours done and then you doing the same for him.

You remember the day he had to leave to go see the boys. Him leaving you at the airport after a tear-filled goodbye as he got on the plane flying back to London. His promise to be back soon.

Being re-admitted to hospital. The cancer getting worse. Starting to think that you’d never see Niall again.

The tears are flowing now, and you’re finding it hard to breathe without waking Niall up. You control the tears, but only just.

Niall starts to stir, and he realises that you’ve been crying immediately. “Calm down babe, calm down.” His Irish accent sounding as sweet as ever as he tries to sooth you.

“I’m fine, I’m fine.” You lie, but it’s not very convincing as your voice cracks on the last word.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, wiping the tears from your cheeks.

“I-” you choke. “I don’t want to go yet. I’m not ready.” You manage to get out before your eyes start to close, and you start to feel as if you’re slipping from his grasp.

“Don’t say that!” he says with a worried laugh. You can hear the pain in his voice, though, as he begs you not to leave him. You open your eyes one last time, and see the tears welling up in his eyes, dripping down his face.

“I love you.” You manage to get out with your final breath.

“I love you, too.” Niall sobs. “Please don’t go! I’m not ready for you to leave me!” he cries, the pain in his voice unbearable. But it’s too late. The cancer has won. You’re slipping away from him, faster now, and all you can hear is Niall pleading for you not to go. Then you hear nothing. Dead silence except for one, long, continuous beep. You let out a final breath, feel Niall hold you tightly in his arms one last time. And then nothing.