Bitterness - Book three of the bitter novels -

Chappie Four

I look through my own eyes,

With the action of another,

I am lost.

I am so damned lost.

Mia's P.O.V

How did this happen?
I can't even try to understand.
How did my whole life turn upside down?

I blink through my own eyes watching the tv show that has become my life. My hands gripping a car wheel driving down a dark road. A skill I have yet to learn. To be honest, I've never really been good at anything but Scarlett makes use of my body, she has skills I would have died for, and in a way I guess I have. The man sat in the passenger seat, Flynn, is watching us carefully, a guarded look on his tanned face. I don't have access to Scarlett's memories so I'm pretty much clueless about him. An old friend I guess. My mind keeps tracing back to that moment when the Cop had pulled us over, his eyes wide in shock as he looked at us. At me. He had seen me, as I had been before Scarlett had taken over,

"I saw my dad's friend..." I think to the girl who stole my life,

"Yeah I know." Her replies to me are always short and quick. I guess she'd rather I sit inside my brain (or wherever I am) and keep quiet. I'd rather she hadn't taken over my body, we don't always get what we want,

"So there's a girl, who's still alive, living inside you?" Flynn peers at us again, a frown that makes him look ten times cuter. He's the type of guy that I would have been obsessed with in my old life, the kind of crush where you dream about the guy for years but never have the courage to talk to,

"Her name is Mia, and yes she's still alive." Scarlett mutters. She'd rather avoid this whole conversation, rather push away the guilt that swamps up inside her when she thinks about me,

"Yes. You ruined my life. You deserve the guilt." I snarl and she flinches. If I had control of my body I would have smiled. Good. She deserves to feel bad, she deserves to feel guilty,

"I didn't do any of this on purpose." She snaps back at me,

"Can you talk to her?" Flynn is asking. I already like this guy, how he can just accept that something this strange can happen. That it is possible. That there are weird supernatural things in this world,

"Let me talk to him!?" I ask her. I beg her. I long to let my words be heard after two years of only talking with her words.

"No. She doesn't talk to me anymore." Scarlett mutters.

"LIAR!" I snarl to her, "LIAR. LIAR. LIAR." I crash  the word down into our brain. My anger is fresh and new. I haven't felt a rage like it before. I'm not even sure where it's came from. But it boils up from inside me. How dare she dismiss me, how dare she take over my body, ruin my life, barley talk to me. Throw me into this life on the run of being chased by crazy assed beasts. What did I ever do to her? For two years I've sat quietly in our mind. Only commenting softly about simple things like the weather. For two years I've not seen my family or my friends. My life she took from me. Completely ruined and now when I have the chance to give her my words to speak to someone, anyone, she lies?

Not cool princess.

"LIAR!" I scream with every piece of rage I can find. The word echoes loudly and that's when it happens. I feel a cool breeze dance along my skin, feel Scarlett cry out,

"Liar!" My voice shouts out in the car. My voice. My word. My lips moving. My hands on the steering wheel, my foot on the pedal. My body shuddering.  The car is gaining speed down the road,

"Scarlett?!" Flynn shouts. I twist MY neck and stare at him, seeing him properly for the first time. I blink MY eyes at him, not even noticing as the car looses control and swerves off the small road. As we slam into a tree, the bonnet crunching up, the windows shattering, MY voice laughing in the chaos.

Nothing has ever been so beautiful to hear than that crazy laugh in the all the ruckus,

"Shit Scarlett, what the hell?" Flynn grunts staring at me. I stare at his shocked face with a smile on my lips,

"Hi. I'm Mia." I say softly.  I can already feel Scarlett pushing against me. She's stronger than I realised. I blink at Flynn, "Please help me." I whisper as I'm thrown back inside. My brief spell of freedom has sucked away any strength that I had and I feel a darkness settle over my world. Perhaps now I will be free from my own mind. Perhaps that lapse of freedom has killed any remaining part of myself that was stuck in our mind.

I slither into the darkness unsure if I will ever return.