Post Mockingjay

Chapter 3

When I wake up, I am screaming. I am almost shocked. I haven't had nightmares this bad in a long time. Peeta's arms are already holding me, and he is whispering comfort into my ear. 

"Shh, Katniss, it's okay. It's okay, Katniss. I'm here. It was just a nightmare. It wasn't real." He tells me. After I can breathe again, I turn to look at him. "What was it about? You haven't had one in so long." he asks me. How could I tell him? I had imagined our child, who is still growing, dying a million terrible deaths, and myself unable to reach the child. Every time I reached the new baby, it was already dead. This is why I never wanted this. Peeta wipes a tear off of my face as he waits for an answer. What do I tell him? 

"I don't remember anymore. Thank you for helping me." I tell him. 

"Always." He says. I am taken aback by these words. It is a simple word, but so full of meaning to us. I manage to smile at him. We lie back down, and I can hear Peeta's breath slow as he falls asleep. Of course, sleep does not find me. Every time I close my eyes, I see the visions from my nightmares. I sigh and slowly move myself from Peeta's grasp as to not wake him. As I leave the room, I see he is still asleep, and then slip down the stairs. I am not sure where to go. I decide on the only place that I have always felt same in, excluding Peeta's arms. The woods.

I write a small note and leave it on the table just in case, and put on my fathers coat and my old boots. I check the time before leaving and see it is barley past ten. I ponder why I feel rested when I remember I must have fallen asleep last night and Peeta must have brought me to bed. That explains the rumbling in my stomach as well. Before I go, I grab a few slices of the cheese bread-which has always been my favorite- and a flashlight then head out the door.

The new streetlights light up the path to the woods. There is an entire pathway to the meadow, but barely anyone goes there. It is a graveyard, after all. I shudder when I see the meadows hill come into view. It is strangely ominous at night. As I approach the woods, I see a figure standing right on the edge of the woods. I suppose it is someone who needs a walk, just as I do, or maybe some teenager wanting to get away from their parents. I almost consider going back, but I decide I can just say hello, and enter into my sanctuary. It isn't as if they are invading it. I see it is a boy, or really a man, as I get closer. Perhaps I should be afraid approaching a man I do not know in the middle of the night, but he doesn't know I am a Victor, I am strong, and my bow and arrow are stashed in the tree right beside him. Not that he seems to be out for harm anyway. He turns around as I approach.

I gasp. It's Gale. 

"Hey, Catnip." He says, grinning. 

"Gale?" I hiss at him.

"Oh Katniss, I suppose I shouldn't have expected a wonderful welcome home. It is you after all, but I must ask, what are you doing out here so late? Oh, I suppose I should tell you why I am here first. I actually was working up the nerve to come see you tomorrow, but I am in District 12 for business. You see, in District 2, I moved up on the chain. I am now working to establish military units in each District, while creating treaties to prevent fighting." The way he says the last part I can tell he is thinking of the lives he cost. One name flashes into my head, but I push it away. It hurts to much to think of her. It is the entire reason I stopped talking to Gale. I would not be able to bear it. The moon lights up his face slightly, and I can see is hair is neatly trimmed, and besides that and a few signs of aging, he doesn't look much different from the boy who was once my best friend. He continues to look at me and I realize I haven't answered him yet. I don't really owe him an answer. I do not owe him anything, yet something makes me answer.

"I just needed some fresh air." I tell him. He nods with understanding. I notice him staring at my hands as I wring them tightly. Then something registers on his face and I realize he has seen my wedding ring. My wedding ring is a simple silver band inscribed with the word, "Always." My engagement ring is a band adorned my the pearl Peeta gave to me in the Quarter Quell. I watch Gale's face and try to make out the emotions that pass over it, but they pass to quickly before he coughs. "So, you and Peeta?" He asks. When I nod, he continues, "I always knew you two would end up together." He admits

"Wait, why are you here?" I demand, "Not in District 12, but in the woods?" His eyes suddenly seem sad, even though only moonlight makes them visible. 

"I wanted to remember." 

I understand what he is saying. Every once in a while, I would return to our spot. I would wonder what we would have become had that bomb not gone off. Now, I wonder what will become of us now. I cannot simply forget I saw him.

"Katniss? Could I come see you tomorrow? So we could talk?" He asks me.

"I-I'm not sure if that is a good idea, Gale." I tell him. Finally, I am being honest today.

He sighs, "I figured you would say that. But just hear me out, okay? I miss you, and I don't think it would be right to just pretend we never saw each other." He tells me. I consider this in my head. What could it hurt? 

"Okay." I tell him, "but I am going home now." I say, turning on my heels, and walking away.

DISCLAIMER: I do not have rights to The Hunger Games Series.