Everyone Pick on Pit Book

Sorry, Pit

*watches a Red Bull commercial like an idiot*

*comes up with a dumb idea*

Red Bull or any other references spoken of in this story belongs to their rightful owners.

Let's get it started.
__________________________
Pit is currently watching a Red Bull. Soon after that, a idea sparked into his head.

TV Commercial: Red Bull. It Gives You Wings!~

Pit: *makes a Derp face before running to the store*

~Hours Later...~

Palutena: *Walks into Pit's room without knocking on the door* Pit, I have--

Palutena: What are you doing?

Pit: D-D-Drinking Red Bull. It said that it will give me wings.

Palutena: You already have wings.

Pit: I know. I want wings that are better than the pair I have, so I can finally fly by myself!

Palutena: Wait...How many did you have?

Pit: About two...twenty.

Palutena: That's terrible! Don't you know Red Bull is an energy drink?! Twenty is too much for a small angel like you!

Pit: It's okay, Lady Palutena. I'm perfectly fine-- *Red Bull kicks in*

Pit:...

Palutena: Pit? Are you okay?

Pit: *Zooms out of his room in a erratic way*

Palutena: Pit! *chases after him*

Pit: *Smashs everything breakable, wears all pieces of clothing of a Centurion Armstrong, finds a way down to the human world, slapped ice cream out of the hands of the first few people he saw, licked up the ice cream with no hands, strips from the Armstrong clothing and wears only his underclothes, and teleports, somehow, to Viridi's Realm*

Dark Pit: *Minding his own business while finishing his daily duties*

Pit: *Pops up out of nowhere* SURPRISE MOTHERCHICKEN *slaps his counterpart*

Dark Pit: WHAT THE HELL?!

Pit: *Does a barrel roll and runs away*

Dark Pit: ...Dafuq was that?

Superego: Memes, Bro. Memes.

Dark Pit: *shakes his head in disappointment*

Viridi: *Minding her own business while doing her daily duties*

Pit: *screams like a goat down the hallway* THE FITNESS GRAM PACER TEST

Viridi: Pit?! How in nature did you get here?!

Pit: *Becomes a cow and brakes everything*

Viridi: *throws her staff at him and screams*

>CRITICAL HIT<

Pit: It's super effective! I'll talk to you later, I'm dead now! *runs off again*

Palutena: *runs after him again* Pit, don't do that!

Pit: *jumps off the cliff* I'm becoming a bird?...No...I'm becoming a cloud! *begins flying, little does he know that he's actually falling to his death*

*Red Bull jumps out of Pit's system, causing him to have a sugar crash*

~Later Once Again...~

Pit: *wakes up in his bed*

Palutena: Pit! Are you alright?

Pit: D-Did I get new wings? Did I fly?!

Palutena: No... All you did was fall.

Pit: But...The Red Bull Commercial says that "It will give you wings!" Wings that are used to fly!

Viridi: *laughs* Did you think that would actually work?! What you saw was a cartoon.

Pit: Then, what kind of animation are we in?

Palutena: We are in anime, Pit. Those kinds of animations listens to gravity and logic a bit more.

Pit: So the Red Bull didn't give me new wings?

Palutena: No...

Pit: And I didn't fly and I couldn't in the first place?

Viridi: Negitive.

Pit: *dies a little* The feels...*almost begins to cry*

Dark Pit: WOOSDONJA! (Y'Know. Dark Souls) *slaps Pit in the face with a Magnus Club*

~The End🤗~

Okay