The Malfoy Principle (On Hiatus)

For This Moment

“Going for a walk alone is stupid, Lea? Who does he think he’s talking to? A student?” Saphira grumbled as she pulled her cloak tighter around her body.  She had long abandoned her costume and had settled for a thin negligee.  In an attempt to clear her head and get away from Severus, she had opted to go for a walk. Well, in actuality, she had stormed out of Severus’s office claiming she needed air and told him not to follow her. She sighed.

“Stupid Lupin. Bringing up things that should just stay buried,” she muttered darkly as she tucked a blonde tendril behind her ear. She had no real destination and simply wandered the castle until she ended up in front of the Fat Lady. She frowned.

“Why am I here?”  She mumbled to herself as she looked around, unsure why she had stopped here. The portrait was asleep like most of the rest of the castle. Saphira shook her head before turning to return to the dungeons. A sudden series of clacking on the stone floor stopped her.  She turned around the face a large black dog with grey eyes. Her eyes widened as she stared at the animal. Her hand instantly reached for her wand, but she quickly realized she had left it in Severus’s office. Fear replaced the curiosity she had felt when she saw the creature. The dog sat on its hind legs and appeared to study her for a moment before its tail began to wag and its tongue lolled out of its jaws.

“What are you doing here, dog?” She asked softly as she realized it didn’t mean to harm her. Instead of answering her, the dog moved to sit directly in front of her. Saphira instinctively reached down and patted the animal’s head. She sighed as she pulled away.

“We have to get you out of the castle. How did you get in here anyways?” Saphira questioned as she looked around. She didn’t think he belonged to any of the students. He was too ragged looking. The animal tilted its head as it looked up at her. His grey eyes pierced her heart as they reminded her of…

“Sirius,” she whispered suddenly as she pulled away from the animal.

**

Sirius cursed mentally. Saphira was steadily backing away and he couldn’t do anything. He didn’t want her to see him like this. He hadn’t expected her to be wandering the halls this late at night, much less near the Gryffindor Tower.

“What are you doing here?” She reiterated her earlier question, but suddenly it was alarmingly furious. Sirius growled, baring his fangs.

“Don’t you dare,” she threatened as Sirius stopped. He could see her teetering very close to the edge of the staircase. One more step and she’d fall to her death. He would be risking everything if he tried to save her. However, when he saw her face when she realized her mistake, he took his chance. He transformed and leapt toward the falling blonde. He easily caught her and pulled her away from the edge. Her eyes were wide and her mouth was open, ready to scream. Sirius quickly covered her mouth.

“Shh, shh, don’t scream, Phira. Please don’t scream,” he pleaded as tears pricked the edges of the blonde’s cerulean eyes. Before he could stop her, she had wrapped herself around him. Tears trickled down her cheeks. Sirius was frozen for a moment before he wrapped his own arms tightly around Saphira’s thin form.

“Saphira,” he whispered as he felt a soft sob rock her body.

“Don’t cry, please Phira?” He begged. Saphira pulled away just enough to press her lips against his. Sirius’ eyes widened.  Before he could stop himself, he melted into her kiss. He pulled her flush against his chest and deepened the embrace. Years had passed and yet she still tasted the same. She still felt the same in his arms. Nothing seemed to have changed, but he knew the truth. Everything had changed. They could no longer pretend to hide their relationship. There could be no relationship. Not until he vindicated himself. Not until she knew the truth.

“Sirius,” Saphira whispered when she pulled away for air. Although he looked ragged and unkempt, he was still Sirius. Loveable troublemaker. Incorrigible cad. The love of her life. In his arms, right then, everything was right. But she knew as soon as she left his embrace, the world would crumble again. They could never be. Ever. Not just because he was blood-traitor, but now he was an escaped felon, on the run from the Ministry of Magic. He was a murderer. He betrayed everyone he claimed to care for. Yet, staring at him now, she could forget all of that. For that moment, she had him.

“I’ve missed you with every fiber of my being,” she admitted as Sirius brushed a blonde strand of hair away from her eyes.

“Never more than I’ve missed you,” he responded softly. Saphira shook her head.

“Much more. Sirius, there’s so much…”

“Not here, love,” Sirius suddenly whispered as he realized how open their position was. He took note of an empty classroom and pulled her to her feet with him. Saphira frowned as she looked around before a grin split her face. Sirius turned to her in surprise when he heard a light giggle escape from her form. When they reached the classroom and he had secured the door, he turned to her.

“What are you giggling about?” He asked as he pushed his hair away from his face.

“Doesn’t this remind you of how we used to sneak around in school?” She questioned as she folded her arms across her chest. Sirius stared at her for a moment before smirking.

“If only it were then,” he mumbled as he crossed and enveloped her in his arms. Saphira’s arms slipped around his waist and she pressed her face against his chest.

“Phira, I have to ask about…”

“I didn’t have her,” Saphira answered quickly as tears pricked the corners of her eyes. Sirius’s eyes widened as he stared at the wall behind her.

“What do you mean?” He asked, almost frightened of the answer he’d receive.

“I miscarried after I found out that you had…”

“Saphira….” Sirius whispered as he tightened his hold. His entire body felt cold and numb. He had never meant for her to be hurt by all of this. He had never meant for her to…

“I’m so sorry, dearest Saphira. I’m sorry,” he mumbled as Saphira pulled away.

“It wasn’t your fault. It was never your fault,” she soothed as she saw his grey eyes water and grow sorrowful. She should be angry at him. Furious, but as she watched his face crumble, she knew she could never truly hate him.

“If I had just gotten…”

“Sirius, my body wasn’t strong enough to have a baby. The Healers said that was the main reason I miscarried. It wasn’t you,” Saphira explained as Sirius shook his head.

“No, no, it’s all of my fault,” he admitted as he and Saphira fell to their knees.  

“I never meant for you to─” Saphira quickly quieted his apologies by putting her hand over his mouth.

“It’s alright,” she soothed. Sirius stared at her.

“Is it?”

“For now. For this moment.”