where mark helps you
trigger warning: self-harm, suicide, and suicidal thoughts, depression
lower case intended
(kind of a drabble and most of the character's ideas/thoughts/actions reflect some of my ideas/thoughts/actions)
"Y/n, I love you," she says. You're confused and look around. You then look into her eyes and see that in one eye you see a sense of genuineness, while the other showed a sense of lying. She smiles at you and you try to smile back. You frown and look around once again. Everything seems brighter and hazy.
"Tracy, what are you doing?" you ask. Tracy just smiles and hugs you and just like that, she was gone and replaced with darkness.
You sit up as your eyes open and you realize it was all just a dream. A cruel one too. You felt like crying from confusion and just overall hurt. You didn't like this.
"Y/n, what's wrong?" Mark asks. You see him rub his eyes and get up from his bed. He walks over to yours and gets in, grabbing you and holding you close to him. You wrap your arms around him and cuddle into him.
"I honestly don't know. I had a dream, a weird one. Tracy was in it, just sitting in front of me and she was smiling at me, telling me she loved me and I ask her what's going on. All she did was hug me and then all went blank before I woke up." You say. Mark rubs your shoulder and sighs.
"It's normal to feel that way, it's normal to miss someone even if they weren't good for you to begin with, it's just remembering that they're not good for you that should be kept in mind," Mark says. You nod and hug him tighter. He kisses your forehead and traces random shapes on your back and strokes your hair, switching between the two. Slowly, you begin to drift back off to sleep.
++
"So, how'd you two lovebirds sleep?" Felix asks as you wake up. You see him looking at you, sitting at the edge of his bed with his legs crossed. He smirks and chuckles a bit.
"Pretty good, actually. I woke up from a weird dream and he comforted me and I slept really well," you answer. He nods approvingly and gets up.
"Well, wake up lover boy Romeo and go get breakfast. I'll save you guys a spot." Felix says and heads out. You walk over to your bed and shake Mark's arm, trying to get his attention. He doesn't budge, so you straddle him (not like that, ya pervs), lightly poking his stomach.
"Mark wake up, ya goof," you say. You begin to tickle him, finally forcing him to wake up. He flips you guys over so that you're under him. He hovers above you and smirks.
"Cute, but don't test me, babe," he says, kissing you softly and getting up as you're about to kiss back. You sigh and stand up as well.
"Felix saved us a spot," you say. Mark nods and leads the way out. You follow and head to the cafeteria.
Once you reach the cafeteria, you get your food and sit with Felix. Andy is already there, talking with Felix. You sit with Andy while Mark sits with Felix, across from you.
"Hey, lovebirds. How'd you guys sleep?" Andy asks, a smirk on his face. You groan and look at Felix with a deadpan look.
"Did you tell him?" you ask Felix.
"I had to, I couldn't not tell him," Felix defends himself. You roll your eyes.
"We slept well, thank you for asking," you say. Andy chuckles and looks over at Mark.
"You guys are cute, hurry up and get together," Andy jokes causing you to blush. You shrug and look over at Mark seeing him blush too.
"Awe you guys are blushing, you're so cute!" Andy jokes. You sigh.
"Stop, we're only little kids, Andy." you joke.
"Sure, hun, sure," Andy says sarcastically.
"Anyways, 5 more days for Felix," Andy says, sounding somewhat excited. You all nod and smile at him.
"How excited are you pewds?" Andy asks him.
"Very excited, actually. I'm so happy to get out of here and be with Marzia again. She's definitely the one," Felix rambles. You smile at his words, wishing you had someone like that, but now is not the time for that. You need to focus on yourself before anything else.
You all eat breakfast, taking the full half hour, enjoying yourselves. Jokes are made, laughs are heard, and it was overall a good time.
As time passed by, you had a nagging feeling that only grew, rather than subsided. You didn't know what the feeling was about, but you didn't like it. It was like an itch that would not go away.
Suddenly, the cafeteria doors opened, and in walked two people. Ally and Tracy.
"Son of a bïtch!" you whisper-yell, causing the boys to turn around and look at what you were looking at. They turn back and look at both you and Mark.
Tracy and Ally had a distance between themselves, as though they got sent in together but as though they clearly aren't together, which they're not. You sigh as you see them look at you.
"Guys, can we go?" you ask. You were especially nervous with Ally of all people around. What if she tried taking Mark back? You know you don't have a right to be jealous, he's not your boyfriend, but you sure felt like things were getting close.
It all happened at lightning speed. They got their food and sat at the same table as you and the boys. Ally, taking the seat next to Mark and Tracy taking the one next to you.
"What are you two doing here?" you ask.
"I needed to make sure you were okay, so I hurt myself and showed my mom and convinced her to bring me here," Tracy says, worry in her voice. You sighed and rolled your eyes.
"And they said they wanted to have a checkup week with me, so I'm only here for the week," Ally says.
This is gonna be a long recovery.
××
Hey, how are you? How's your week been? How about your day? Anything cool happen lately? Got any plans for today/tomorrow? Eaten well lately? Sleep well? I love you guys and you're all awesome people.
This week has been pretty cool. Took the PSAT on Wednesday and partook in memes even though I shouldn't have bc I took a pledge that I wouldn't, so now I'm probably under the college board's radar or something. Who knows. Thursday was the forest trip and i had the best time ever. I'm still sore from it tbh. There's this cute boy in my class who I have a crush on and he was in my group and like he stuck by my side bc we were the only people we knew in that group and it was lit and it was so fun to run around and jump over rocks and trees that were knocked down and we ate under a native cave (pictured here)
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we just had a blast. Friday was pretty fun too bc we are doing a project with that same forest group so my crush is in my group and im so happy and yeah. Essentially im over my friend so that's good but as i mentioned I'm crushing on this dude now and yeah. Now I'm headed to Dinuba to visit family and then im coming back to town and heading to my sister's house afterwards. Anyways,
Fangirl here.
Rant here.
Optional, tell me; name or nickname, age, pronouns, favorite school subject, and future dream job.
What's your opinion on the Mark/Matt&Ryan situation?
