Zigzag Logic (Bill Cipher X Reader)

Grocery Store

You woke up and yawned. You looked around. You were on the couch. You looked outside. It was the noon sun.

Suddenly something hit you. You should've been awake hours ago and in the forest! You instantly got up off the couch and rushed around, looking for everything and nothing at the same time. Soon you rushed outside and into your lab to search through everything to find your research papers on the stag.

You slammed open the door, making the various papers flutter around. Bill turned from the white board he was writing on to look at you, a little surprised. "(Y/N)? Something wrong?" he asked.

You looked at Bill and at the dry erase marker in his hand. "W-what are you doing...?" you started in a panicked stutter. "I-I've been working on that equation for a year!"

"Oh! I was just fixing it up!" Bill responded and gave you a sweet smile. He stepped out of the way to show you the completed equation.

You walked up to it, reading through it. "Wh-.... How...? I-I haven't been able to find out that variable for years...." you mumbled.

"Oh it was simple!" Bill exclaimed and turned the white board around to the empty side. He scribbled numbers on it. "If you carry the two and multiply it by four, then divide eight by sixteen, you get one half. So then it's just a simple task of finding the square root of point five!"

Your jaw dropped. "I-I.... I.... How did you think that up?"

"Oh I know a few things. Well, lots of things, actually," Bill replied, setting down the marker.

You groaned, the sudden fear finally leaving you. You sat down on a nearby chair and ran your hand through your messy hair. "Did you find anything to eat?" you asked, picking up a pen and clicking it.

"Actually... no. There wasn't anything in the fridge that wouldn't kill me. Or in the counters. Do humans eat rat poison?"

"Wha-... No. We don't. Dude, were your parents super strict or something? You don't eat anything with 'poison' in the name," you answered, confused as to why he said "humans."

"Oh," Bill said simply.

"Well, you wanna come with me into Zigzag to get some food, then?"

"What's Zigzag?"

"The name of the town we're in. Weird name, I know," you said, beginning to walk out of the door.

Bill started to walk after you, following a foot behind. "I like it. The name, I mean."

"Mhm," you nodded, getting into the driver's side of your truck. Bill sat in the passenger's side, and apparently needed to be told to put on his seat belt.

***

You got out of the truck and walked into the town's "grocery store" which was really more like a convenience store with vegetables. Bill followed, keeping close to you. You walked inside with your hands in your pocket, trying to seem inconspicuous; the problem was that Bill pretty much glowed in that yellow suit of his. He had probably changed into that while you were asleep.

You grabbed a basket and threw some stuff into it, mostly boxed pastas and ramen. Bill picked up one of the boxes and read the ingredients and nutrition facts.

"Sodium sodium sodium... why is there so much sodium? Isn't that bad?" Bill asked, looking up at you.

"Sort of, yeah. But it's cheap," you replied.

"That's strange... You have a nice house. Why don't you have money?"

"I get grants. Those are for research. Not food. My house is actually my parents' mountain home. I pretty much live off of welfare. And food stamps."

Bill frowned. "Kid, you're really worrying. And boring," he said, putting the boxed pasta back in the basket.

"I focus on my research. Not on 'having fun' or whatever. My research is fun, anyway," you replied, placing everything on the miniature treadmill, watching the boxes scoot toward the cashier.

You walked outside to your truck, Bill following and continuing the conversation. "All work and no play makes you boring. Why don't we just go do something that isn't stalking a deer for hours?"

You sighed, knowing Bill would persist if you said no. "Fine. What do you have in mind, Cipher?" you asked, moving back and forth between the bed of your truck and the bags of boxes.

"What about.... sledding? That's a thing people do, right?" Bill said, getting into the passenger's side of the truck while you hopped into the driver's side.

"Yes. It is. We'll go to Snowbunny. It's the only place that doesn't cost money."

"It sounds pathetic."

"If you're willing to hike a little, there are better hills than just the one that's visible," you responded, driving back home.

"Sure!" Bill exclaimed happily.

***

You were digging through a box full of your former fiancé's old stuff, looking for a decent coat for Bill. Bill was outside, being completely unhelpful, and trying to scoot a sled through the thick snow.

You looked outside. He had barely moved five feet, but he was persistent and kept throwing his chest forward, gripping onto the sides of the sled tightly, scooting little by little. He looked like a child, completely absorbed in the useless task he was performing.

You rolled your eyes and continued back to your work, a small smile now on your lips.

After a while, Bill came back inside, a proud grin spread across his face. He put the sled down and walked up to you triumphantly. "I got to the end of the drive way!" he exclaimed.

"Good for you, you dork. Now try on these pants and this coat," you said, shoving the items in Bill's hands. "And these boots. Just keep everything on if it fits."

Bill nodded and headed upstairs, trying to keep his balance.

You put on everything over your clothes, topping it off with a nice little hat. You sat on the couch and waited for Bill, tapping your boots on the hardwood floor.

Bill soon came out, everything seeming to fit him perfectly. He scooted down the stairs, slipping every now and then due to him not being used to the boots. You got back up and grabbed Bill's arm.

"What are you doing?" Bill asked, trying to hide his pink cheeks.

"If you think I'm about to kiss you, I'm not doing that. I'm going to put on these gloves," you answered.

"I-I wasn't thinking that!" Bill said quickly. "And I already have gloves..."

"Dress gloves are going to do absolutely nothing. Honestly, it's like you've never been in the snow before," you said, forcing the gloves onto Bill's outstretched hands. "Besides, with those wounds you've got, the bandages would freeze to your hands and then we'd never get them off."

Bill huffed.

"Now come on. Snowbunny's a decent distance away from here so we might as well leave now before it gets dark. We've only got a few hours before the sun sets."

You headed outside, Bill waddling after you, and hopped in your truck. Bill plopped himself down and had to be told once again to put on his seat belt.

"To Snowbunny we go..." you said under your breath and turned on the truck. It let loose a low grumble, as if it was protesting against being used for more than one round trip. Then it began to hum, backing up and driving down the driveway toward the snow hills.