Third Time's a Charm

5) We Don't Know How To Quit No More

"Aaayyyyyyy!" Castiel said, pointing finger guns at Dean. "I know you!"

"Aaaaayyyyyyyy! I know you too!" Dean said, pointing finger guns back.

"Aaayyyyyyy, leave your boyfriend alone." Anna snapped. She glared at Castiel.

Dena leaned over and muttered into Castiel's ear. "Who pissed in her Cheerios?"

"She's just frustrated. And she doesn't like Cheerios." Castiel informed him. "And he's not my boyfriend." He said to Anna.

She snorted and muttered angrily in her scrambled eggs. Dean edged away from her and closer to Castiel. "Why does she hate me?"

"She's upset because some celebrity is thinking about quitting her favorite show to play in some action movie series she doesn't like." Castiel hummed.

"Maybe she just doesn't like your humongous ego?" Sam suggested, sitting down next to Dean. Dean gasped and put his hand over his heart.

"I am wounded-you see this? This is me, with a broken heart. You hurt me, here." He dramatically fell into his plate of bacon and pancakes.

Dean then sat up and pointed at his chest and Sam rolled his eyes. "What heart? You mean the nonexistent one?"

"Yeah, that would be the one." Dean said grinning. Sam followed his gaze to see an apple pie sitting on the Novak's kitchen counter and groaned.

"Hoe don't do it." Gabriel said sucking a lollipop.

"Dean, this is breakfast! You are not devouring that pie at six am." Sam said, making bitch-face number thirty-two (don't eat the fucking pie).

"Wanna bet?" Gabriel said leaning towards Sam. "I say he can't last before seven."

"Six thirty." Sam said shoveling half a pancake in his mouth.

"Deal."

Dean glared at them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I told you." Sam said staring at what was left of the pie. There was an empty plate with only a few crumbs and a fork on it.

"Damn. Your brother may have a problem." Lucifer remarked as he stared at the remains. "You just wait until Cassie finds out Dean ate his pie."

"Oh yeah. Dean's a goner." Gabriel hummed thoughtfully. "Cassie's a competitive fucker, who loves to eat."

"Honestly same though."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Dean. Did you eat my pie which took me seven and a half hours to make?"

Dean nervously grinned at the sex-haired teenager who was currently glaring at him and wondered if he had enough time to jump through the window. "Uh...no?"

"I'm going to torture you so slowly that you will be begging for me to kill you. No one in the history of torture's been tortured with torture like the torture you'll be tortured with." Castiel promised darkly.

"That's my line!"

Chuck face-palmed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Dean's going to die." Michael said watching his future-little-brother-in-law chasing his other future-little-brother-in-law through the house, Dean screaming bloody murder. Sam and Gabriel were sitting beside them also watching.