The Hunters

Chapter Twenty

Pine Needles

    "No, darling," his voice bounces in my head.

    "What do you mean no?" My voice rises, "My father approved of you- why aren't you happy, why are you surprised?"

    "Because it's not possible, you see, your father didn't even like us being friends so it's most unlikely that he agreed." Cyprian's eyes are on fire and I'm trying my best to hold my ground.

    I clench my jaw, "Why? Why is it so impossible for you to believe?"

    He doesn't say anything and I can tell he's holding something back. It's written all over his face and he's guilty of something. He's holding back on me. He doesn't think I'm strong enough and it seems nowadays people never believe I am capable of what most are not. They're afraid of my skills, my thoughts, and my being. It terrifies them.

    "If you're not going to be happy about us then maybe there shouldn't be an us." The words pour from my mouth and I'm drowning in them.

    "Don't say that," he says sternly, "I'm happy that we can be together, that is great news, darling, but I don't deserve you."

    "That's crap!" I scream at him, "Don't make up shit like that and throw it around. What could you have possibly done that makes it so you don't deserve me. Were you hoping my father would say no?"

    He doesn't say anything. He gives me one look up and down and he closes the door of his small wooden home in my face. I'm left at his doorstep with my mouth open in shock. What the hell did he do? What changed in the last hour? My mind roams the worse of the worst and I settle on the fact that maybe he doesn't love me and was just using me. I want to scream, I want to cry, I want to rip the Earth in half.

    My eyes blur and I stare at the pine trees that surround me. I want them to die. I imagine their beautiful green pine needles slowly turning darker and browner until they're depressing and falling from their tree. Their everlasting life finally disintegrating and soon their is a pile of pine needles surrounding the bare pine tree that no longer has anyone to hang onto. Just like me.

    And I am so desperately wishing to destruct.

    Memories haunt me everyday now, it seems. Currently, I am scanning the time I disappointed my father- but isn't that daily nowadays? I was only twelve years old and I wanted nothing to do with people other than my own family and Cyprian. I would ignore people who tried to befriend me, but one boy stuck out to me- Aramis.

    He started bugging me when training season had started for the kids and my father taught it. Everyone always knew Aramis had a huge crush on Maggie, he'd try to show off to her all the time, but Maggie was a shy little girl who'd try her best to ignore this hypergenetic boy. Cyprian and I would laugh and bet how long it'd take for Maggie to tell him to leave her alone.

    One day during training Aramis was fooling around with his bow and arrow to impress Maggie. It made me so furious that I walked over to him and outright yelled at him that he was going to break the bow and hurt someone. He laughed at me and continued fooling around. The last string inside of me broke and I pushed him. He had let go of the arrow and it was flying freely and finally it hit my father in his arm.

    Of course I was blamed because if I hadn't pushed Aramis he wouldn't have let the arrow fly. My father separated me and Aramis from training together which meant I was also separated from training with Cyprian.

    I ignored my father until he agreed he would move Cyprian into my training classes if that was really wanted. I told him it was and he told me that he hoped I wasn't becoming attached to him. I asked why and he answered: Love is a weakness for a hunter. It makes you weak. You must focus on saving yourself, not others. But if you don't save others, I realize, then you're alone forever. I don't want to be alone.