Chapter 22

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Message received on 23rd November 2015

"Hi Harley. It's me, again. I'm just... I want know how are you. We haven't heard from you for about three months. I think I'm slowly losing my mind. The ignorance is driving me crazy. I just want to know if you are okay, if you are happy. We all want to. It's hard for us all. I think Ben has already lost his mind, he is trying to cover it...but I just know. He just can't understand it, noone of us can. Brandi, Hayley and Brittany are just as confused as we are... Because you have just  disappeared, without saying a goddamn word. I'm calling everyone, who may just know anything... I even called Ahren but he didn't tell me a thing.  I guess you don't want to talk with me, but doesn't Sam, Cam, James or even girls deserve an explanation?... Just please say something."

***

Message received on 31th November 2015

"Goddamn... I've been typing your number and deleting it for hours.... I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry for being such a dickhead and not believing and trusting you. I can see it now and I've could for last 4 months. I miss you like hell. You have no idea what I'm dealing with right now. They say if you love them, let them be happy even without you. But I don't even know if you are happy... are you? I hope so."

***

Message received on 25th December 2015

"I think my phones aren't even making sense... but I love your voice and I will call you just to listen your answerphone. *laughs* Merry Christmas, Harley. I hope you are spending these days in lovely and warm atmosphere. I hope today and every other day you are laughing, 'cause I just love your laugh. And I miss it, as much as I miss your smell, your body, your jokes, you... If you wonder I'm today at my parents'. Also the tour was okay but I rathered seeing you backstage smiling to me. So yeah... bye."

***

Message received on 13th February 2016

"It's been a long time. I thought I could carry on without you but these phonecalls became my addiction, even if you don't listen to them or answer. I don't even expect you to. I don't know what to say. I hope you are fine, as always. I like to think you are living your dreams, it makes me happy. What happened in my live? Nothing but touring. It helps to forget about you. Few days ago you haunted my mind again. I just can't get over you..."

*pip*

- Denis, just please stop. I have my life, you have yours.  We are not supposed to be together, not matter how much you want it. You need to finally give in!

- But I won't. I can't.

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