Beautiful Mistakes {Zayn M.}

Chapter 32

“How have you sat in here for the last three days?” Sabrina asked. She was sitting on the couch looking at her phone, clearly bored.

I couldn’t stop the laugh that came out of my mouth. I loved the girl to death, but she just didn’t get it. “Actually,” I walked over to where she was sitting, and took a seat behind her. I winced from the pain of the surgery when I sat down. “I haven’t been in this room that much. Whenever annoying people like you aren’t here, I’m in the NICU with Val.”

“So what do you do? Just sit there?” She raised her eyebrows at me.

“Yeah.”

Her attention went back down to her phone. “Well that seems boring.”

Even though Sabrina was my best friends, and she would never do anything to hurt my feelings, that comment got to me. I was a new person now, and even I was still trying to understand everything. I didn’t know two things about being a parent, but I did know that my daughter needed me. If I had to sit by her every hour that I could then I would to that.

Now, because of her ignorant comment, I was getting defensive. “It isn’t boring. I’m not doing it to get entertainment. I go in there because she is my daughter. If I can’t have her in here with me I’ll go in there to her.” I stood up and went back to the hospital bed.

Right as I was laying down, Aleeah and Katlyn came walking into the room. They had been visiting Valentina. Only two people were allowed in the NICU at a time to see her, and since they were leaving to go back to Cambridge, I let them have as much time with her as they wanted.

“How’s she doing?” I asked them. Aleeah took a seat at the end of the bed while Katlyn sat down next to Sabrina.

“Great.” Katlyn smiled. “They kicked us out though because they are going to feed her, and all that other fun stuff they have to do.”

I nodded my head. It hurt my feelings knowing I wasn’t the one to get to feed her. I was actually looking forward to start breast feeding. It’s something I had always planned on, and now I can’t even do that. Now the food, the formula, my daughter is getting is being fed to her through a tube that goes down her nose and into her stomach. I wanted to be the one to change all of her diapers, and burp her, and cradle her when she was crying.

“She already looks a lot better than she did a few days ago. You’ve got yourself a healthy baby Rose.” Aleeah smiled at me. She knew how I felt about the whole nurses taking care of Valentina thing. She said that she would feel the same way if it were her.

“I know, and this morning I swear she smiled at me.” I laughed. Katlyn and Aleeah laughed also.

Sabrina didn’t find that funny though.”She can’t smile yet.” She stated.

My sisters and I turned out attention to her. “Sure she can. It’s just involuntary. Like a reflex they have or something.” Katlyn tried to explain. Her logic didn’t seem right, but it was good enough for me.

There was an awkward silence in the air. I didn’t know what I should say, or what I should do. Sabrina was acting different ever since Valentina was born. It was almost like she was jealous of how happy I was. I didn’t want to confront her about anything though. The hospital setting wasn’t the place to do that. We would only end up causing a scene, so I decided to let it go for now. I didn’t need that added stress.

“So?” Aleeah started. I moved my gaze from Sabrina to her. “When is Zayn getting back? And where did he go? This is like the first time he’s been gone since you got in here.”

“He went home for a little bit. He said he needed to do some things before I came home. God only knows what he is doing.” I leaned over to the table next to the bed to retrieve my phone. Zayn had been texting me the entire time he was gone, but it had been a while since I heard from him.