f o u r t e e n

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Song attached: Unbreakable by Jamie Scott. Oh my god, this is one of the most beautiful songs I've heard and it has one of the most beautiful music videos ever. Bet everyone could relate to this song because we've all been through that sad, lonely, stagnant, nothing-makes-sense-but-can-I-have-someone-who'll-just-be-by-my-side state sometime in our short life.

Read the note at the end. Important stuff.

                                          f o u r t e e n

                                          [ s u r p r i s e ]

I don't remember my dad arriving at the hospital. I don't remember him tapping my cheeks to wake me from my shocked stupor. I don't remember him dragging me away. I don't remember getting pushed into the car. I don't remember him talking to Kiranya. I don't remember getting home. I don't remember walking to my room. I don't remember falling on my bed. I don't remember anything that happened after Kiranya had pointed to that window.

But I do remember what I saw there.

I do remember it in crystal clear clarity.

I remember peering inside to watch a woman on the bed. I remember how her head was lifted from the bed as if there was an invisible pillow underneath. I remember the grey streaks of hair on her rich brown hair. I remember her eyelids draped over her chocolatey caramel eyes which made me all warm when I was six. I remember how she looked normal like there was nothing wrong. I remember the lack of any medical equipment or machinery in the room. And I remember staggering back, shocked at seeing the lady with the warmest smile of my childhood looking like a corpse.

Kiranya's face was wiped off of any emotions like always, her previous tears gone as she let me judge. Come up with my own theories. I remember asking her what happened. I remember her keeping quiet.

It wasn't an accident. From what I saw, it was evident that it wasn't an accident. Well, not a physical one at least.

The agony in her eyes seemed to burn something in me. Everything had dissolved into a blur then and suddenly, I couldn't feel the floor beneath me or Kiranya beside me. It felt like I was trapped into a bubble of my own, where every outside noise was just a buzz and every outside scenery was a blur canvas.

I remember wishing it to stop since I didn't feel anything.

"Varun," a worried whisper called, snapping me out of that suffocating bubble.

My mother was standing beside my bed, fear and worry etched on her face. My dad was behind her, looking more tired than ever.

"What happened?" she asked turning to my father and her voice broke. I've never seen my amma like this. Happy? Yes. Stern? Yes. Stressed? Yes. Broken? No.

My heart constricted as tears rolled down her cheeks.

"I've been calling him for more than twenty times. Did you or did you not see?" she whispered at my father before it turned into a screech, "where did you pick him from this afternoon? What happened?"

She looked so scared and the bubble appeared, expanding and seeming to grow bigger as the sudden break in my hazy conscious sealed back. If seeing my mother looking scared at my well being and shedding a few tears ripped my heart out of my body then what did Kiranya feel when she saw her mother in that state?

Cold.

Alone.

Dead.

I couldn't even imagine.

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