Need- k.t.h

x18x

Aria

I inched my way towards her, satisfied by the look of fear in her eyes. I wasn't myself but I loved it, I loved the power I felt and wanted more. 

A voice that didn't sound like mine urged its way up my throat as I backed Tuai up against the wall, my eyelids steadily twitching and my irises burning, "So long I have been suppressed.." the voice hissed, surprising my real self that was still half-aware. 

This being I was at that moment was not me- yet, at the same time, it was me. Older, violent, fueled by pain and rage it seemed, "...so long you have taken him from me.. can no longer hold back.." the voice hissed more, confusing me yet making me feel as if I knew exactly what it was talking about. 

Indescribable pain shot through my mouth as I felt my teeth shift, each one spacing apart and elongating. What the hell was this? I tried thinking through the rage that consumed my body, but to no avail. 

My right hand reached up to her and my long fingers wrapped in her hair, pulling her head back harshly to the wall. She groaned in pain, my uncovered sadistic self grinning at it. I moved my face closer to her neck and my eyelids twitched even more as I ran my nose up the side of her neck, sniffing. 

"How I wish I could rip your throat out..." the voice said as it returned, my chest constricting and my neck cracking as my body tried not to shift into.. something. "Wh-what are you?" she whispered in fear, her eyes wide as they took in my appearance. 

I felt my hair shifting on my head but I couldn't tell what was happening, instead taking in her shock when she glanced at me. "A... a kumiho?" she whispered in horror. The part of me that was still here didn't know what she was talking about, but the other part that just surfaced nodded as if in adoration of itself. 

"Mmm yes.. the oldest of my kind..." 'my' voice muttered, grinning wide and flexing the fingers that still held onto Tuai's hair. "Aria, stop." My ears twitched, higher than I remembered them to be and my head shook, pain shooting through me. 

Not physical for once, but emotional, and suddenly I felt connected with the me that I just discovered. As if my subconscious wouldn't let the two parts of myself collide, half of me remained confused yet filled with sorrow at the sound of Taehyung's voice. Heartbreak. That's what I felt, heartbreak and betrayal. 

"You left me.." I said, the sadistic voice becoming more like my own. "You abandoned me when I needed you... this whole time.." It felt like I was speaking someone else's words, yet I knew they were my own, my memory was just too suppressed.

"Part of me remembers everything, part of me wants to but is too afraid.." I whispered to him, leaning back and closing my eyes, never loosening my grip on Tuai's hair. "You betrayed me." I hissed, the voice returning louder. 

My hand that gripped Tuai's hair pulled her head forward and then shoved it back against the wall incredibly hard, the sadistic Aria satisfied when her limp body fell to the ground. I knew somehow that she was still alive, I hadn't wanted to kill her. I felt him move closer to me from behind, but I didn't want to turn around. I couldn't bear to see him. 

"I needed you to help me remember, but you just left me.. for her.. You didn't even look for me.." the voice inside of me cried, my body shaking as I fell to my knees. Taehyung suddenly ran around my body and collapsed onto his knees in front of me, cupping my cheeks in his hands and pressing his forehead to mine. 

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.." he whispered repeatedly, tears streaking down his cheeks. "I'm sorry my love, I'm sorry, I was so afraid.." he kept saying, looking into my burning eyes. When scalding tears leaked from my lids, his thumbs came up to brush them away. His touch and the way he was looking at me caused something to shift inside me. 

The tenseness I felt slowly disappeared, the sharpness of my vision downgraded, and I felt my teeth retract a little back into my gums. My ears, whatever had been wrong with them, slowly returned to normal and I was able to breathe a sigh of relief. Sadist Aria was tamed for now it seemed and I closed my eyes, my breath hitching in my throat when Taehyung's fingertips rubbed against my ears soothingly. 

"I didn't know it would return so soon, I thought you were safe from yourself without me," he whispered, causing me to open my eyes. His gaze was full of remorse and sorrow but I didn't know why. "What did I mean when I said that you.. betrayed me and left me?" I whispered, my eyes feeling heavy. 

"This side of you.." he whispered back, referring to when I went mad, "..was dominant until I met you. You were 7 years old and feral, lost and afraid, but I found you and loved you for all of you. I put this side of you to rest." He said, gazing into my eyes. 

"But that was the human you that was so young. You are a Kumiho, Aria. The oldest of your kind. Your father from those papers, you were set on killing him until you felt the love and adoration he held for his wife and son, and you changed your mind. No one had ever heard of a Kumiho doing that." 

He moved his hands from my face and gathered me into his arms, with my hands at the back of his neck and my legs around his middle, watching him struggling to stand and then walking us to the boy's dorm. He whispered to me the whole way there, telling me the story of my own life. 

"Hunters were after you," he continued, "..and they found your family. The night of your family's murder was when the hunters were closest to grabbing you. But you ran, you ran and I'm so happy you did." I felt his chest shaking, a sign that this was hard for him. 

"You were ravenous afterwards, alone in the woods. You killed everything in your sight out of pain and anguish, you wanted the love back. But one day, we met, and everything clicked. So young, but we knew we needed each other," he whispered into my hair when we made it to his room, him laying me down on his bed and climbing onto it to hover over me. 

He leaned his head down to press his forehead to mine, his eyes closing as he gripped the sheets on either side of our bodies tightly, "And someone took you from me, warning me not to go after you or else they'd kill you and burn the body, meaning you'd never be able to come back.." Tears dripped onto my cheeks, but they weren't mine. I reached up and cupped his face in my hands, blushing when he turned his head and pressed his lips to my palm. 

"I've never felt pain as much as I did that night, and all the nights afterwards, not knowing if you were okay. I willed myself not to find you, so that I wouldn't endanger you further. I wondered why you weren't using your abilities to break free, but I hadn't known that the man who took you fed you arsenic food to keep your body too weak to change, but not weak enough that you'd die." His body shuddered and pressed down against mine, his lips trailing down my face to kiss my jaw. 

"When I found you that night, outside the gates, I felt my whole world turn. You looked so broken, so weak. You didn't remember me or even yourself and that hurt me every day, but I thought it'd be too much for you to know the truth." He kissed along my jawline softly, I still felt the tears he shed and soon enough I was crying too. 

"I have always loved you," he whispered, his face back over me as he rubbed the tip of his nose against mine, "I'm not losing you again." He pressed his soft, full lips against mine and I felt my whole body breathe for the first time, as if I had been living a life that wasn't mine. 

When he pulled back to look at me, I laced my fingers into his hair and pulled his head back down, locking our lips together once again.