It's Still Complicated (a Malec AU)

The Complicated Lack of Trust

Alec Pov- I laid in bed with my eyes closed listening to the silence of the room. I don't really remember getting into bed. I must have fallen asleep on the couch and Magnus brought me here. "Magnus... did I fall asleep" I asked reaching over to the spot where Magnus slept. I frowned when I felt that the spot was empty and cold.

"Magnus" I asked softly, trying to open my eyes but they were so heavy. It wasn't just my eyes that felt heavy. My entire body felt exhausted. Was it from the stress of meeting the social worker? Maybe I over exerted myself.

There was a dip in the bed telling me that someone sat down next to me. "Magnus?" I asked softly, reaching out for him. The hand that reached back was cold as it clenched onto my wrist and pinned my arm down against the mattress.

I cried out in pain from the force of the hand on me. "Magnus? That hurts; what are you doing?"

A snicker came from above me as more weight was put on the mattress. I could now feel a long, lean, strong body on top of me; pinning me down against the sheets.

Suddenly I could feel the room start to change around me. The nice warm comforter Magnus and I shared together was now a thin sheet and the soft mattress was hard with springs digging into my back.

I gasped loudly not liking how familiar this all felt. The hardness of the bed, the smell of alcohol and smoke in the room, but worst of all there was the strong lingering Oder from cologne that wasn't Magnus's.

"You're... you're not Magnus..." I choked out, feeling my body go into full on panic.

The body above me used his free hand to clench my other wrist pinning me down to the bed harder. I screamed out as I thrashed and kicked out from under him wanting to get away. It was no use though. The man was stronger than me. It was like all my strength was sucked away.

"Poor, poor little Lightwood. Your parents left you all alone in this big bad part of town without any protection. I came down here to find myself a whore but I never thought I would find you" the man above me spoke.

I clenched my eyes tight still struggling to get free. "Who are you? Let me go now!"

The man didn't listen to me. He just kept talking as if I never spoke at all.

"I thought you looked beautiful before in a professional setting but now, having you here under me being completely defenseless; you look absolutely delicious."

"Please... stop" I begged but his grip on me just got tighter. He leaned down so our chests were pressed together and I could feel his breath in my ear as he spoke.

"You should get used to being treated this way. Being someone's play thing is all you'll ever be good for."

I gasped, my eyes opening wide in horror. Those were the same words that my rapist said to me years ago. His words are what made me lose faith in myself and turn to prostitution. Am I having a nightmare or is this a memory?

"W-who are you" I asked softly. My entire body was shaking in fear. The man above me lifted his head away from me ear, looking down at me. The shadows were covering his eyes so I couldn't see them. All I could see was his cold twisted smile.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled sitting up in bed and punching the body that was on top of me. I heard Magnus let out a cry in pain as he grabbed his stomach. "What the hell Alec? I was just trying to wake you up; you were having another nightmare. You didn't have to punch me in the gut."

I bit my lip reaching over and rubbing his back "I'm sorry Magnus I didn't mean to hit you. You were on top of me and I thought I was getting attacked."