On mute

Chapter 13

I wanted to cry right here in The middle of the road!

I think it's 3 am...

It's raining really hard, and I'm walking in it.

I wanna go home!

But I can't, I don't have a home!

I cry my eyes out and sit under a tree on the side of the highway.

Alone.

I don't wanna be alone!

I want someone to hold me tight and tell me I'm not alone, that they won't leave me.

That will never happen...

I cry in to the rain. Thinking only the sky feels bad for me that's why it's crying to.

Someone hold me.

Anybody?



-NEXT DAY-



I wake up and started walking again.

Thank goodness it's still Raining so nobody can see I'm still crying.

I cried myself to sleep and then I woke up crying.

Why does everyone think that just cause I have no sound means that I have no feelings?

I have feelings.

They're hurt now more than ever.

I cry and cry till the rain stops.

Then I know I have to hold the rest of my tears back, so no one will see.

I sit on a park bench. I have no idea where the hell I am.

If someone where to rape me and kill me I'd be okay with it.

If someone killed me they'd put me out of my pain, so I'm okay with it.

If they do both at least I'll get lust and death.

To thing I want so badly to experience.
Love and death.


-LATER-


I walk on the side of the highway, again.

I would drive my car, but I don't know what happened to it.

I reach 'the bad side' of Cali.

I keep walking.

Nobody cares.

Why would they?

I hear gun shots all around me. A few cop cars, yelling and peoples feet.

I keep going till a cop car come up to me.


-LATER-



I'm at the police station and they're trying to find my family.

No luck.

"What's your last name." A cop asks.

I spell it out in sign language but they don't know what I just did or how to spell it.

Another cop comes into the room and lays a gun in-front of me.

One thought comes to me.

I pick it up cock it and pull the trigger.